Season 3 Episode 16: His Mercy Is More

Can We Talk?
His Mercy Is More - Episode Description

It’s been a wild ride lately, with the heavens opening up just as we were about to get our hands dirty in the garden—talk about timing! But every cloud has its silver lining, or in my case, every bird “blessing” is a sign of good luck, right? This week, we’re inviting you into our world of contrasts and reflections, as we wrap up an incredible fundraising marathon, overflowing with gratitude. But it’s not all been smooth sailing; I faced a surprising challenge as I closed a book mid-narrative, honoring my own tastes over the pull of ‘writer’s guilt.’ Meanwhile, Kayla shares her steps on the road to recovery after her hip injury and we both buzz with excitement about our upcoming Disney escapade. And for those who can relate to the late-night symphony of a noisy sleep machine, I’ve got a tale that ends with sweet, silent slumber.

Our hearts are full as we recount the success of our latest fundraising efforts, reaching a milestone that seemed like a distant dream just weeks ago. The joys of a 103% goal completion, combined with the intimate moments of spiritual closeness and the recognition of life’s little mercies, have left us humbled and reflective. Self-acceptance is a dance, and we’re learning to move to its rhythm, discussing the often complicated relationship with societal expectations, body image, and finding grounding in something greater than ourselves. Joined by our friends Adam and Tricia Reed, we delve into the power of tiny blessings in daily life, and we’re throwing a trivia prize giveaway your way—because who doesn’t love the chance to win a cozy coffee mug and some cheerful stickers? So grab your earbuds, get comfortable, and join us as we share this rollercoaster journey through life’s ups, downs, and everything in between.

His Mercy Is More - Transcript

0:00:00 – Announcer
We go together like Peas and Carrots. The Peas and Carrots Podcast, sharing life from our piece of the vegetable patch, Brian and Kayla Sanders.

0:00:11 – Kayla
Welcome to the Peas and Carrots Podcast.

0:00:13 – Brian
I’m Brian and I’m Kayla. Welcome to this week’s edition of how does the garden grow… peas and carrots. You get it.

0:00:20 – Kayla
Oh Okay, it took me a sec, sorry, okay, here we are, all right. Well, right now it doesn’t because I haven’t planted anything, because all it’s done is rain, but bitter party of one. So here we are Anyway.

0:00:41 – Brian
Bitter party of one. Your table’s ready. Bitter party of one, and we have a special tonight on spaghetti, okay.

0:00:51 – Kayla
On a more positive note, what’s up in the world of peas and carrots? Actually, it’s what came down on the world of peas and carrots as I walked this morning. Oh yeah, you and a bird. We’ll leave it here. We’re going to keep this PG. As I was walking my mile, a bird blessed you this morning. Yes, right, it here. We’re going to keep this pg. As I was walking my mile, a bird blessed you this morning.

0:01:07 – Brian
Yes, right on the front of your shirt. Yes, I wasn’t wearing a hat, so I’m thankful. I’m a little thankful. I have a gut that it hit that, because that sticks out and it didn’t hit me on my head. So, yeah, it’s first time in my life I’ve ever been blessed by a bird. It happened to me at the beach.

0:01:25 – Kayla
Yeah, I was so mad. I was just minding my business reading my book and bloop, and it even hit your chair. Yes, it was nasty. Well, seagulls put out a lot. Okay, let’s stop. I’m just saying it’s a wrap.

0:01:40 – Brian
It’s a wrap.

0:01:41 – Kayla
Our fundraising season is done.

0:01:43 – Brian
It’s a wrap.

0:01:43 – Kayla
Our fundraising season is done. Yes, it officially ended yesterday, thank you Lord, and we’ll share our results here in just a few minutes. But we have seen the goodness of God.

0:01:53 – Brian
Yes, we have. We certainly have Thank you, I did something for the first time.

0:02:00 – Kayla
You did. Okay, so technically you did two things. For the first time, you actually picked up a fiction book, which I encouraged you to do, so I’m kind of feeling like I went up in flames on this, but you gave up on it.

0:02:15 – Brian
I actually read half of it. You did.

0:02:17 – Kayla
I read and out of kindness to the author we are not going to share the name but it just wasn’t for you, and this was the first time I’ve ever seen you set down a book.

0:02:26 – Brian
Because I have what’s called writer’s guilt, Like because I’m a writer, I’ve written two books and, like, I know the pain and the creativity and the hours and the work it takes to write a book. I know all that, yeah, but I got. This is a 400-page New York Times bestseller and I’m really I got this is a 400-page New York. Times bestseller and I’m really. I mean I read 200 pages of this and set it down.

0:02:53 – Kayla
I mean books need to move faster than I think. You might need to flex your muscle a little more. On fiction, though, I’m going to get another book for you to try again.

0:03:00 – Brian
No, I’m not reading. No frou-frou thing.

0:03:03 – Kayla
I don’t think I said frou-frou, I used the word fiction, okay.

0:03:07 – Brian
So calm it down. Well, you also read all that murder stuff.

0:03:10 – Kayla
I’m not going to make you do that yet. Okay, so Yet. So I started a new habit. The last couple of weeks I started walking a mile a day, really During my break. Really I thought I would miss running. So this was part of my hesitation, other than the fact that I’m just lazy and I kind of thought, well, this is going to make me feel me because I used to love running, but on my breaks I’ve been going and like walking near work and there’s this cute little church that I walk by and I go into the neighborhood and then I come back. I’m really enjoying this. And not to belabor this, but an update on the hip after the fall down the stairs, I think it’s really helped with that.

0:04:01 – Brian
It’s healed.

0:04:01 – Kayla
So my hip is well and I think the walking is only doing.

0:04:06 – Brian
We got a Disney trip in about three weeks. Do not fall, you’re welcome.

0:04:10 – Kayla
Okay, okay, just felt that you are picking up a new sleep machine at the day of this recording. Can I say hallelujah and amen.

0:04:26 – Brian
Because at the beginning of fundraising season I guess the first or second night of fundraising season- the motor decided to start dying.

0:04:35 – Kayla
So this is all I’ve heard for six weeks, as your motor is.

0:04:44 – Brian
Interacting with my breathing. That’s what it’s doing, and so we’ve had everybody loves Raymond playing at night. All kind of things, trying to drown it out what I liked is when I got up to pee at one o’clock Golden Girls was on.

0:04:57 – Kayla
Oh, my word, that was pretty good.

0:04:59 – Brian
TMI. Oh, but there we go. I’m sure the people on this podcast, the people listening, go pee.

0:05:06 – Kayla
Okay, some of us use the word potty, oh, but all right.

0:05:09 – Brian
Okay, potty, wow. Okay, this is where we are. This is the end of five weeks of fundraising. Six, six, my filter’s a little broken.

0:05:20 – Kayla
Not to be clarifying or anything, but Not to be.

0:05:26 – Brian
We got to get to the next segment.

0:05:31 – Kayla
Life is a series of ups and downs. That’s a given. We all know that there’s no perfect day. You’re not promised anything, but I am not sure that we have ever seen a season as wild as the past three months.

0:05:48 – Brian
Yeah, there’s a spiritual principle here. If you listen to the episodes where we talked with our friends Adam and Tricia Reed, we actually talked about this spiritual principle and I told Kay this morning I’d like to dedicate a segment of our podcast back to this principle. Again, it’s a principle that I call tiny mercies. Okay, because when there’s so much stuff going on, that’s bad. Yeah, I have to look for the good. Because here’s my thing If you’re constantly hearing the bad, it’s going to bring you down. Or if you constantly focus on the bad, guess what it’s going to do to you? Yeah, it’s going to bring you down. So you got to look for the good. For me, when you’re going through bad things, when you’re walking through the valley of the shadow, don’t just focus on that. Look for where else God is working and remind yourself of that.

0:06:45 – Kayla
We’ve hinted at this in other ways. When my dad passed away you know that I went through a very hard season. I developed a habit of keeping a gratitude journal.

0:06:55 – Brian
Hmm.

0:06:56 – Kayla
This is kind of like a living breathing gratitude journal, and I still do that to this day because we all trend toward the negative. There’s just so much of it in the world. Tiny mercies, seeing them, accepting who they are from, keep us from just drowning in the negative. So we’re going to walk through some things that have happened.

0:07:23 – Brian
In just the last five to six weeks.

0:07:26 – Kayla
Yeah.

0:07:27 – Brian
So first of all, probably one of my I mean, he’s one of my best friends in the world. He’s my executive assistant. He’s navigating the house fire.

0:07:37 – Kayla
Yeah.

0:07:37 – Brian
His house caught on fire.

0:07:38 – Kayla
And every week comes with a new layer to it. Yes, now they’re okay, nobody got hurt. The house is yeah, his house caught on fire, and every week comes with a new layer to it.

0:07:41 – Brian
Yes, now they’re okay. Nobody got hurt, the house is being cleaned, so there’s that, and then.

0:07:48 – Kayla
We have a sweet friend who she suddenly lost her dog and then learned on the heels of that that she was going to need a biopsy after a mammogram that showed some concerns.

0:08:01 – Brian
Then we had the sudden loss of a team member at PAR. He was a friend. He was on our future leadership team, which meant I interacted with him a lot as a mentor.

0:08:13 – Kayla
You two basically texted daily.

0:08:15 – Brian
Yes, I loved him. He was like a son, he was like a younger brother and just pouring into him and the Lord took him home. I mean 44 years old, I was just crushed.

0:08:30 – Kayla
We have a friend who lost her mother-in-law and within days of that she lost her aunt.

0:08:34 – Brian
Yes, we have a friend whose daughter was also in a car accident. Everybody’s listening to this right now and going. We are not getting around the Sanders for the next few months. We are going to avoid y’all.

0:08:48 – Kayla
We have a friend who’s walking a relative through dementia.

0:08:52 – Brian
And then your grandma passed away.

0:08:53 – Kayla
Yeah, we lost my grandma, and one of your best friends lost his dad.

0:08:57 – Brian
Yes.

0:08:58 – Kayla
And I mean there are things that forgive us if we have not highlighted it. That is just the icing on the cake of what has been going on behind the scenes.

And at the same time now, this is not to belabor this point we’ve been in a fundraising season which is it’s exhausting and it’s a spiritual attack at times, because you’re putting God’s message out there 12, 13 hours a day and you’re asking people to worship him with their money, and the enemy does not like that, and so it’s a given. We know that hard things are going to happen during fundraising season. This one has just felt to use one of the kids’ terms it’s felt extra, I mean.

0:09:45 – Brian
What’s that More?

0:09:47 – Kayla
A lot.

0:09:48 – Brian
Okay.

0:09:49 – Kayla
But even so we have seen so many tiny mercies.

0:09:55 – Brian
The Lord’s protection of our friends and the provision as they almost literally rebuild their home, I mean the Lord’s taking care of them.

0:10:03 – Kayla
Yeah.

0:10:04 – Brian
And provided, and I will try to help him focus on that too.

0:10:09 – Kayla
on the good, the reminders. Yeah, we got news that the biopsy that revealed some issues. None of them are invasive carcinoma and all of them are benign. We’re thankful for that so thankful.

0:10:25 – Brian
A team of 65 people that’s poured out love, even as they collectively grieve so many losses. This team fundraised through grief. They fundraised through all these different. It’s been like a pinball machine getting hit here, hit here, and yet they kept moving forward.

0:10:42 – Kayla
The resilience.

0:10:43 – Brian
Yes.

0:10:44 – Kayla
And the care. Yeah, we have both seen. Now this is something you and I talk about a lot and we could spend an hour just on this. Prayer comes easy to me. It’s hard. I love to pray, but it’s been a growth process for you.

0:11:01 – Brian
For years.

0:11:02 – Kayla
You find studying and reading easier.

0:11:04 – Brian
Oh, it comes like a second nature, I feel like.

0:11:06 – Kayla
Talking to God is just. It’s a constant for me, and yet we have both seen a deepening of that.

0:11:13 – Brian
In the last two or three months, the Lord’s turned my heart. Now I still read, I still study, I still love it.

0:11:19 – Kayla
Yeah.

0:11:22 – Brian
But I also find myself throughout the day I’ll just be praying. I’ve never been like that before, Never. I will still do my main prayers in the morning, but throughout the day I’ll just be praying and I’m like, who am I? Now? That’s not bragging on me, it’s that. That’s a tiny mercy the Lord has given me during this season, he’s changed your heart. Well, you needed changing.

0:11:46 – Kayla
There’s been a true slowing down. We’ve had to choose rest at times and we have found peace in the simplest of things. It’s not been anything grand or epic that has given us joy. It’s been the little things.

0:12:00 – Brian
We have a church family that’s continued to bless and grow us, and Bible study classes and sermons reminded us again and again of who he is, no matter how life is. I was texting with our pastor the other night and this is just another tiny mercy. And it’s also hilarious. I got a new book on theology and so I just took a picture of it and I texted it to him. And what does he text me back? A picture of a Dr Seuss book. In other words, you’re reading that and I’m reading this. That’s hilarious.

0:12:32 – Kayla
Absolutely hilarious. We had had a really tough day. It was just. Leadership comes with its own level of drama, but this day just had about three days worth. On our drive home, there was a beautiful rainbow. Reminder of a promise, and it was a reminder of a promise, and it was as if God was whispering I’ve got this, and it was just. It was a very sweet moment. A friend left random flowers on the front porch.

0:13:04 – Brian
Nobody does that for me. I don’t get random flowers.

0:13:07 – Kayla
Oh, OK.

0:13:08 – Brian
Well, you got to enjoy them I found that sweet for you that during your grief, your friend.

0:13:14 – Kayla
Oh, it was.

0:13:15 – Brian
it was beautiful, just showed up with the just left him on the front porch.

0:13:18 – Kayla
And I enjoyed them for like two and a half weeks. I just I didn’t want to let them go.

0:13:24 – Brian
A fundraising season that went from four weeks to six because of the loss of a team member, and yet the Lord blessed us with 103% of goal. Who would have thought? I mean, I’m sitting here, blown away.

0:13:38 – Kayla
Knowing what people are having to spend for groceries and gas, and there’s all the things. There’s graduation parties, there’s end of year this and end of year that, and for people to say, oh, I want to support this ministry, Absolutely wild.

0:13:53 – Brian
I’ve also felt the closeness of the Lord in this season. I mean, I don’t say that lightly, because most of the times I don’t feel him, and that’s normal life, but he has been near to us in the last four to six weeks.

0:14:09 – Kayla
Yeah, it’s nothing to shake off. When you feel a peace that is unnatural, when you’re going through hard thing after hard thing and you see the Lord’s goodness in giving you peace, even for moments of the day. I hope you can stop and say that’s God, Because we’re not wired for that as humans. We just aren’t.

0:14:36 – Brian
I’m also thankful for the kindness of friendships.

0:14:39 – Kayla
Oh, my goodness, yes, we have had so many text messages and cards, and a friend even took the time. This blew me away. She had some wind chimes inscribed with my grandmother’s name, and so when I see them and the wind blows, it’s to remind me of her and the Lord’s goodness. People have gifted us plants and I’m going to do my best, y’all, to keep them alive. Don’t get your hopes up. Y’all Stop. We’ve been given meals and, yeah, it’s just and not just us. I have seen this play out for team member after team member. I’ve seen our church do this for loved ones in our church that are going through hard times or in different seasons, and this is what it looks like. This is what the tiny mercies look like when life is tough.

0:15:36 – Brian
So again, here’s the spiritual principle when you’re going through stuff, even on days when you’re not, keep a little folder or keep a journal and write down the tiny mercies, write down the good you see, don’t just focus on the negative stuff you’re going through. Turn your head and look and see where else he is working, what you’re learning about him, what you’re learning about yourself, and that will actually encourage your heart to keep on going.

0:16:05 – Kayla
It will. It’s twofold. I will say this when you are able to reframe your thinking and see his mercy, you also become a person that shows it to others.

0:16:18 – Brian
Amen, so keep hope alive. Look for the tiny mercies. Well, this is your topic. You’ve been bringing this up.

0:16:32 – Kayla
I have and, okay, I’m going to be brave because this comes with. First of all, it comes with a confession. I was getting ready for church a couple of weeks ago and it was one of those weeks where I had not planned well. I did not get my outfit together.

0:16:49 – Brian
the night before. When have we planned? There’s that.

0:16:54 – Kayla
I was trying to get ready for church, I was trying to put an outfit together. Everything I tried on it was either too tight or it was uncomfortable, or I just it didn’t feel appropriate for the weather and I had a little bit of a meltdown, and you didn’t know it at the time. But I mean I had a mini meltdown because I was just so irked with myself and with this phase of life.

0:17:22 – Brian
And I’m downstairs watching Meet the Press, thinking you know, everything’s fine and I, just I am that person. This phase of life.

0:17:26 – Kayla
I’m downstairs watching Meet the Press, thinking you know, everything’s fine and I, just I am that person, and please don’t roll your eyes if you’re listening to this. For 45 years of my life, the number on the scale was exactly the same. It may have fluctuated one or two degrees, but I had this crazy metabolism. I could eat anything. Now, if I sniff cake, I gain three pounds.

0:17:49 – Brian
That’s not true. It is it’s not true?

0:17:52 – Kayla
I sniff cake. So it was just. It was this moment where I, just I was so frustrated because I have a closet full of beautiful clothes that I felt like were just haunting me, closet full of beautiful clothes that I felt like were just haunting me, which led me into a spiral of well, this is your own fault because of this, this, this and this. But then I had to take a step back and remind myself of some things. Loving ourselves, even when we don’t like certain aspects, is crucial to remembering whose we are. God doesn’t define any of us by the way we look, or by our weight, or by how many goals we’re crushing.

0:18:35 – Brian
This is a huge hurdle for me. I’m trying not to get emotional because I have struggled with my weight since I was a child. Yeah, I have been on. I’ve been on over probably over 200 diets in my time, my lifetime member of Jenny Craig. I don’t go there anymore.

0:18:53 – Kayla
Do they even still exist?

0:18:54 – Brian
Yeah, you go online. Oh, okay, but this is a huge issue for me because this is really personal. Every day, in my prayer app, I actually ask forgiveness for my size and I ask him to forgive me for being this large, because I feel like it’s a sin for me to be like this.

0:19:16 – Kayla
Oh mercy.

0:19:17 – Brian
So I appreciate your words that we have to love ourselves, even though there may not be certain aspects of ourselves that we don’t like.

0:19:25 – Kayla
Yeah, and that’s hard to do. It just is Because we can easily become our own critic.

0:19:33 – Brian
Every day. Now let me say this there’s nothing wrong with pursuing a healthier us.

0:19:39 – Kayla
No, because we’re both doing that. Yes, yeah.

0:19:43 – Brian
But you’ve got to pursue Christ more yes, then you got to pursue Christ more yes, then you have to pursue that. So, because I can’t believe, I’m going to say this you’re not a number on a scale you’re not I feel like I am yeah but we’re not and my appearance and certain things I mean the aesthetic of our home or the life’s comforts that we’ve acquired.

0:20:09 – Kayla
None of that sits higher than our image in Christ. And so, yeah, it’s. Am I seeing the needs of those around me as I see my own goals and desires? Am I accepting again whose I am, rather than the conditions that I’ve put on being seen as good and yeah, and fitting into this mold of society? That, yeah, which lends me to this, and this is the whole thing that I’ve been chewing on for the last few weeks. It really matters the voices we listen to. Not everyone needs to cold plunge. That’s this big trend now where everyone’s doing these cold plunges or detox or drink a gallon of water every day.

0:21:02 – Brian
Is a cold plunge, like where you jump in the ice water.

0:21:05 – Kayla
Yeah. I ain’t doing that well it’s. It’s this big trend right now, but it’s not necessarily safe for everyone jacket I’d give it a go but also, just because I may embrace minimal minimalism in some areas of my life, it doesn’t mean that everyone has to, and there’ll be other areas where I don’t so, but here’s the thing.

So this is kind of two-sided and I may sound like I’m contradicting myself. When we do refuse to hear from others because we don’t want to feel challenged or perhaps gifted a perspective that can help us to learn and grow, then we’re limiting ourselves, because this is why it is so important to assess the voices that are yours.

This kind of builds on the whole boundary thing we talked about last time, but you need people who are speaking truth to you. So this is not saying that no one gets to have a say, but you have to be the one to decide what you take away from that. And if you block everyone out and say, well, no one’s going to tell me what’s good for me or what’s bad for me, and I’m just going to put on my blinders, because, truthfully, one of the best things I did was listen to a trainer who helped me to believe that I could accomplish things that I never would have dreamed I could, and helped me overcome a sugar addiction and helped me to focus on specific goals, but at the same time, I’ve had to find my own way on a few things like something as silly as okay, this is how much water I should drink today. But we live in a world where so much messaging is coming at us.

0:22:53 – Brian
Everybody.

0:22:55 – Kayla
And there’s this bent towards and I’m just being real, I had to even check myself there is this bent towards secular messaging that is drowning out biblical truth and what Christ would tell us to do in relationships and in taking care of the temple that he’s given us, which is our body, and various other things. And so, yeah, it’s a lot more to unpack, but yeah, y’all, don’t forget this Our bodies, they are complicated.

0:23:26 – Brian
In the relationship that we have with them, and even the people that, like you, adore, like I’d like to be like that person, there’s things about their body that they hate. Yeah, they absolutely hate. So find your best path and walk. It’s all I can say. Is that wisdom, or is that?

0:23:43 – Kayla
Oh, absolutely, and I love what a friend shared with me several years back. What if we take a moment to appreciate all the seasons that our bodies have carried us through? What if we think about all the ways that our bodies have cared for us in good and bad times?

0:24:03 – Brian
We haven’t given up yet that get you.

0:24:09 – Kayla
Yeah, that got me.

0:24:12 – Brian
I can tell you this I’m out of summer and fall. I think I’m in winter.

0:24:15 – Kayla
Stop Seriously. If we take a step back and think about all that our bodies have done to serve us, maybe we would be a little kinder to them.

0:24:29 – Brian
I will try, I’m going to promise. Oh, I know.

0:24:32 – Kayla
Well, this is hard for all of us.

0:24:34 – Brian
It could carry a little bit more ice cream, and I’m sure that there’s going to be another meltdown when I need to put an outfit together.

0:24:41 – Kayla
Well, let me know, so I’m not down there, clueless watching Meet the Press outfit together.

0:24:42 – Brian
Well, let me know, so I’m not down there clueless watching Meet the Press. Hey, thanks for listening to this week’s edition of the Peas and Carrots podcast and, by the way, we’d like to send you a Peas and Carrots coffee mug.

0:24:55 – Kayla
Yes, and Cute little stickers.

0:24:58 – Brian
There’s a How’s that go. Cute little stickers.

0:25:02 – Kayla
She loves. I love the stickers. She does so the first two folks to go to our website, which is Peasandcarrotspodcast.com.

0:25:10 – Brian
When you get there, what do you look for?

0:25:12 – Kayla
Look for the trivia button. Okay, and you answer this week’s trivia question, which is “what is a tiny mercy in your life?” So go to our website Peasandcarrotspodcast.com.

0:25:28 – Brian
Click on the trivia button and what’s this week’s question?

0:25:31 – Kayla
What is a tiny mercy in your life?

0:25:34 – Brian
Yeah, answer that question. We’ll send you a coffee mug and some cute little stickers.

0:25:41 – Kayla
You can also follow us on Facebook and Instagram. Just search for the Peas and Carrots podcast. And hey, you can also follow us on Facebook and Instagram. Just search for the Peas and Carrots Podcast.

0:25:47 – Brian
And, hey, you can also search Peas and Carrots Podcast wherever you get your podcasts, or visit us at our website peasandcarrotspodcast.com. And when you do, please don’t forget to subscribe to the podcast. And, by the way, what are those stickers again, what do you call them? They’re cute and little.

0:26:05 – Announcer
For more about the Peas and Carrots Podcast and to reach out to Brian and Kayla, visit peasandcarrotspodcast.com. Life’s not perfect. That’s why God gave us friends like Melody and Candi. Check out QuirksBumpsandBruises.com, or search Quirks, Bumps, and Bruises wherever you listen to podcasts.

 

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Season 3, Episode 9: Fix-ated on That

Fix-ated on That - Episode Description

Join us on this week’s Peas and Carrots Podcast as we kick things off with a light-hearted utensil tussle – are you Team Spoon or Team Knife when it comes to spreading mayonnaise? But it’s not all fun and games; we also share our personal takeaways from a month-long habit tracker. Discover the highs and lows of maintaining good habits, the quest to include more greens in our diet, and our heartfelt encounter with a newborn member of our church community. Plus, we debate the pros and cons of daylight saving time and share a few laughs over nocturnal phone screen shenanigans.

Listen in as we explore the complexities of faith in the professional realm. We open up about our own spiritual journey and how it’s shaped our approach to ministry work. The conversation takes a turn towards the profound as we discuss the necessity of grace in both ministry and relationships, focusing on the essential beliefs that unite Christians while extending a circle of grace to the varied interpretations of non-essential doctrines. And let’s not forget to touch upon the role of Old Testament laws and the true path to salvation through Jesus’s sacrifice – it’s a reminder to avoid judgment and embrace compassion.

Finally, ready your ears for a delightful linguistic jaunt as we compare the quirks of British and American English. From attempting (and failing) to nail British accents to deciphering terms like ‘trolley’ and ‘dummy’, this episode is a linguistic treat. Wrap up with us as we chuckle over classic British phrases and their American counterparts, all while paying homage to the cultural staples that make each version of English uniquely charming. So grab your headphones and a cuppa, and prepare for an episode that’s as cozy as mismatched socks on a chilly day.

Fix-ated on That - Transcript
0:00:00 – Announcer
We go together like Peas and Carrots. The Peas and Carrots Podcast, sharing life from our piece of the vegetable patch, Brian and Kayla Sanders.
 
0:00:11 – Kayla
Welcome to the Peas and Carrots Podcast. Hey, I’m Brian and I’m Kayla.
 
0:00:15 – Brian
Good to have you. We have two new friends in the studio with us.
 
0:00:18 – Kayla
We do, it’s actually you surprised me with this.
 
0:00:22 – Brian
I did and it’s a pea and a carrot.
 
0:00:25 – Kayla
They’re stuffed toys. Yeah, we should clarify, not like literally. We have a pea and a carrot.
 
0:00:33 – Brian
Okay, but I got them from Hallmark. They’re so cute and I brought you one of them and you they have magnets, so they like. So you see, we go together like peas and carrots there you go, we’ll share a picture. So yeah, we will. Yeah, it says better together peas and carrot. No, so what? How’s that go?
 
0:00:56 – Kayla
Yeah.
 
0:00:57 – Brian
All right, before we move on, there’s a word that you have been using that has spread throughout the PAR team now, and I’d like to confront you in the spirit.
 
0:01:07 – Kayla
Oh, really? Well, that’s just tomfoolery.
 
0:01:11 – Brian
That’s the word. Yep, I know which word it was. Okay.
 
0:01:13 – Kayla
I’m not apologizing for it. Why? Because sometimes it fits, it just does so. You asked the PAR team. Yes, you are making them choose to give up one, and it’s between bread and rice and pasta and potato, yep. And so I told you this is tomfoolery, I’m not doing it, and someone else agreed so.
 
0:01:39 – Brian
It’s just a great word, Tom. What’s it mean? Like foolishness, but oh yeah, How’d tom get in there? Well, I don’t know. Bless him, I don’t understand.
 
0:01:49 – Kayla
Speaking of PAR.
 
0:01:50 – Brian
Yes.
 
0:01:51 – Kayla
We had the joy of spending this past week with our leadership team, doing some planning and dreaming, and there’s a lot of fun.
 
0:01:59 – Brian
There’s a lot of fun, the best leadership team we’ve ever had. We just love people of character, wisdom, patience. They put up with me big dreams, oh big dreams, and I’m thankful for them. We had great laughs, great meals. We did so. One of our Adam McCain, who’s my number one. One had COVID so he had to zoom in. He said he felt fine the whole time he looked like he felt okay, yeah, so, but you know, covet as Doug Day said, said man day two of COVID, your hair looks great.
 
I’ll never forget that. So okay, Miss Kayla, who’s also known as Al Roker, you’re keeping track of the weather.
 
0:02:41 – Kayla
Well, if we are keeping track, yes. We’re on our fifth fake spring in the new what is fake spring? So fake spring is. We’ll have like two days that are cold and Windy and rainy, and then here comes this beautiful blue sky day with 65 70 degrees. And then, just when we get like lulled into the thought that it’s spring, here comes another cold and windy and rainy day and I mean, aren’t we gonna be in like the 20s?
 
0:03:09 – Brian
Next week we’ll have some highs. They’re like 73 and then and then there’s a couple of nights where it’s like 29.
 
0:03:16 – Kayla
That’s crazy. So yeah, but I will say this the trees are starting to look beautiful, all the pink blossoms, so I want to handle this in a public form. Again. I want you.
 
0:03:27 – Brian
This is twice I want you to prepare your heart that next week we’ll have to turn on the air conditioner.
 
0:03:32 – Kayla
Okay, okay, you think that’s gonna bother me right now. I Didn’t.
 
0:03:41 – Brian
Do you want to tell them why that’s not well, I think they could figure it out.
 
0:03:44 – Kayla
I’m 51 years old, so yeah, you’re gonna be the one looking for a sweater.
 
0:03:49 – Brian
Trust me, she loves to sit in her easy chair with this big thick blanket and we’ll be watching some show. All of a sudden, out of the corner of my eye, I see a blanket sling across room.
 
0:04:01 – Kayla
Okay, you might be over sharing.
 
0:04:02 – Brian
I’m not baby. Are you warm? Little bit!
 
0:04:07 – Kayla
Can’t help it.
 
0:04:08 – Brian
So all right.
 
0:04:09 – Kayla
Big news, big news. Somebody has a birthday this week.
 
0:04:15 – Brian
Mm-hmm.
 
0:04:16 – Kayla
And it’s not me.
 
0:04:18 – Brian
It’s me, yay. I will turn 56 on March 15th, four years from 60.
 
0:04:27 – Kayla
Yeah, I may have stepped off it at the other day.
 
0:04:29 – Brian
Yeah, we were talking and I said, baby, can you believe I won’t be 56? And what was your response?
 
0:04:35 – Kayla
Oh, my gosh 56?. Yeah, that’s, exactly.
 
0:04:38 – Brian
And see in my head, I’m like that’s 19 years from being 75. I’m like I’m really having, oh my goodness, no, I’m really struggling. No, I think it’s awesome. I don’t know if I’ll make it 75, but we’ll see.
 
0:04:49 – Kayla
Yes, you will. I hope you will. So happy birthday, B. Thank you, darling, love you. Let’s fix that.
 
0:04:58 – Brian
Well, it seems some tape or some glue to fix this.
 
0:05:01 – Kayla
No, this isn’t the kind of thing that calls for super glue or duct tape. It’s so tempting for all of us to want to jump in and fix a problem or rescue someone, and that’s not always a bad thing, but it’s also not always ours to do. And I think of parenting. Not that we’ve experienced that we had a dog and we’ve got stories but sometimes leadership compares to this, would you agree?
 
0:05:31 – Brian
100%, because you see people struggle, people that you love, who struggle and they might struggle with this decision or they might struggle with this area, and you want to step in and you want to rescue them.
 
0:05:44 – Kayla
Yeah, and you have leaders come to you often addressing this and sharing that they just don’t know if they should jump in or if they should sit back, or and there are times we are meant to take a step back and let other people figure things out- I think that there’s an old adage that says that you try to keep children away from touching a hot stove. Yeah, but if they ever, what’s the best way they’re going to learn?
 
0:06:10 – Brian
Well, you know, the first time they touch it, I guarantee you they’re never going to touch it again. Yeah, I guess this is the principle that you have to let people fail.
 
0:06:20 – Kayla
Yeah.
 
0:06:20 – Brian
You have. Even and this is for me as a leader, because I have a lot of people who work for me you have to let them fail, and sometimes I want to be embarrassed like this looks poorly on me, well, okay, but is them learning a lesson more important than my personal pride? Who? And I think the answer to that has to be a yes, because it’s not about me, it’s about, I mean, think about this. Let’s look at this from, like, Jesus’s perspective. He’s looking down from heaven. Well, that one there just went off rails. He’s letting us fail so that we can grow.
 
0:07:04 – Kayla
Yeah, we’ll come back to that. I think of a child when they’re learning to walk, to tie their shoes, work a puzzle, manage their school schedule as they get into like middle school and high school. You want to prepare them for college and for, like time management and all those things. Basically, being a good human, be responsible, and it’s the same with leading teams or with managing home life, as you said. Sometimes we really have to ask ourselves. So that’s what we’re going to do. We’re going to look at a series of things that we’ve considered in this, and you alluded to one when you talked about is it our pride and what was it?
 
0:07:48 – Brian
you said about that. Yeah, I mean, sometimes it is that we don’t want this person to fail, especially at something that we have purview over, because we’re afraid it’s going to make us look bad as a leader.
 
And yet I’ve seen or as a parent, or as a parent or grandparent, and so we want to actually rescue them when really the best thing we can do is to let them fail and they will learn the lesson. So somebody else’s failure isn’t your failure, and you have to be willing to let people fail so that they can grow. I think the book of James says that you have to endure things so that your character grows.
 
0:08:31 – Kayla
Perhaps we’re more concerned, if we’re really honest, about our comfort or our ease, and Resisting the urge to jump in creates this anxiety for all of us. But that doesn’t necessarily mean we should overstep now. Okay, someone is going to say, but they could get hurt. Well, we get that. Of course, there are times that you are going to jump in somebody.
 
0:08:56 – Brian
Jump out of an airplane without a parachute. You’re you might want to rescue them.
 
0:09:00 – Kayla
I’m saying this is just stuff that if they’re learning how to navigate life, if they’re learning how to manage money, learning how to do a budget, learning how to care for others, or something like that to manage their projects, to Get their homework done, if they’re in high school or college or Nobody was following me around in college saying make sure you show up for class on time and make sure that you get your homework done and write that paper and those are skills that parents teach while their kids are at home in, hopefully, in middle school and high school, so that when you do release them to the big wide world they can cope. And it’s hard when you are Coming alongside someone who is in their own struggle because sometimes the reality is they did not have someone in their life that was doing that for them when they were growing up.
 
0:09:59 – Brian
I like what you said, that we’re more concerned about our own comfort and ease, and this is what I’m thinking. If this person fails, if this person drops the ball on this, or if this kid does this over here, yeah, is that going to create more work for me, is that going to create more Anxiety for me? And so that’s a temptation To want to step in and rescue them, yeah, so that I don’t have more stuff to do back here and there. Again, you have to count the cost. What’s more important? Yeah, your own comfort.
 
Hmm or this person learning lesson. I’m gonna go on record and say I like to be comfortable you do so.
 
0:10:43 – Kayla
I’m gonna let you take the next one, okay.
 
0:10:50 – Brian
We’re gonna skip this one. No, yes, we are. We’re gonna say. Are we coming from a place of impatience rather than resting God’s timeline? I’m a very such a patient baby. Stop it Now, that’s fine. I’m gonna hurt being cared over here. Oh, I Am a very impatient man. There’s a famous phrase in par that if Brian wants something done, when did he want it done?
 
0:11:14 – Kayla
Yesterday, yesterday.
 
0:11:15 – Brian
I have tried to grow in that and there’s a principle that I try to follow I want to be patient with accomplishing the mission. I want to be impatient with the task that will do that. So the first one is oh. The second one, oh Say a lot. And so this is where I am in this. I’m an imperfect man, I’m an impatient man and I often do not rest in God’s timeline.
 
A lot of us are guilty of that and there’s a piece of me oh, I hate to admit this there’s a piece of me that believes that leaders and parents and school teachers and employers that God’s using us to develop character in others. Now, that doesn’t give me a blank check To make somebody’s life miserable yeah, something like that but it does mean that I have the right to push them a little bit.
 
0:12:24 – Kayla
Sure.
 
0:12:24 – Brian
So am I impatient.
 
0:12:27 – Kayla
Yes, it’s learning when it’s the time to do that.
 
0:12:31 – Brian
To be impatient?
 
0:12:32 – Kayla
Yeah, and I mean not everything can be hurry up, the world is burning kind of mentality. But there is a situation that may arise where and this is from kids on up to grown-ups that maybe someone is stuck and we need to help them get unstuck, or maybe they need an external motivation. I think of parents that you know if you get your room cleaned within 30 minutes, we’ll watch a movie tonight, or if you get your homework done, we’ll go get ice cream. Sometimes those are the external motivations you need, but to your point. I love this truth and it’s the image of how Jesus is with us. He will put us in situations that are meant to prune us and grow us, and that’s on him to do that. We may feel like he’s gone silent at times, because he’s not necessarily the one like nagging at us, or we can feel like he’s just gone really quiet in our lives, but it doesn’t mean he doesn’t care. He’s always there and nothing is outside of his plan, but sometimes he’s just letting us walk through it.
 
0:13:48 – Brian
Yes, god never leaves you, he never forsakes you.
 
He’s there all the time, but you may not be able to feel him at the time, and so he lets you experience that, in hopes that it will drive you even closer to him and hopefully that will actually grow us. That leads into how opposite we are as like leaders and also parents, because there used to be a term called helicopter parents and now there’s a phrase called lawnmower parents, so the helicopter parent used to be referred to as the one that was constantly like swirling around making sure that nothing got dropped knowing when to jump in and rescue.
 
0:14:30 – Kayla
Well, now the term lawnmower parent comes, and we may have referenced this before this drive to like push ahead of your child or push ahead of your team members so that you clear the path and make it smooth for them.
 
0:14:44 – Brian
And there’s no burden.
 
0:14:45 – Kayla
Well, I hope you’ve got all the time in the world to do that for the rest of your life if that’s what you’re doing, because A little spicy there, but it’s okay. I cringe when I see parents or leaders or other people doing this. You’ve got to give people the freedom to figure things out, and if we’re constantly running in front of someone to either clear the way for them or rescue them, what happens when you’re gone?
 
0:15:14 – Brian
I am trying to grow a group of leaders who can step in on the day I either die or I retire. That’s where the sits. You have to prepare for what’s next.
 
0:15:26 – Kayla
Well, I’m going to go for the mic drop moment here, Because this may sound like it’s all about pointing the finger, and to assure you that it’s not for all of us. May we all be so focused on ways we need to grow that we aren’t hyper-focused on things we feel the need to fix in others.
 
0:15:47 – Brian
Say that again. That’s powerful.
 
0:15:49 – Kayla
May we be so focused on ways that we need to grow that we aren’t hyper-focused on things we feel that we need to fix in others, Because there’s that whole passage in Scripture about the speck in your brother’s eyes. That’s exactly what I was thinking yes, and the plank in your own, and it’s easy to overlook the things that we need to be working on by distracting ourselves with. Well, if I fix this and I fix this, let the focus be what God’s doing in me, not what he needs to do in someone else.
 
0:16:27 – Brian
Well, you’re done going to preach it now, and you’re 100% right, Miss Kayla. I mean because if we don’t, then that leads to self-righteousness and everything else Self-topic, but one that we need to wrestle to the ground often. Hey, hi, hi, we got a letter, we got a letter.
 
0:16:51 – Kayla
Is it Blue’s Clues? We just got a letter. We just got a letter. You’ve never seen that. You’re looking at me like I’m crazy. Okay, we are now watching Blue’s Clues, okay.
 
0:17:01 – Brian
Okay, all right, I’m bringing Godzilla in for this segment.
 
0:17:04 – Kayla
No, why we went from Blue’s Clues to Godzilla.
 
0:17:08 – Brian
You had Pea and Carrot on here earlier it’s Peas and Carrots Day. Yes, but we have. But we got Godzilla here today.
 
0:17:15 – Kayla
Back to the topic at hand. We are absolutely blown away by how many people have taken time to engage with us over the last few months, and forgive us, we are not going to take the time to Thank each one individually, or we would be here all day. It would be fun, but you all have lots of other things to do. But we wanted to take a minute To say thank you for some of the texts and the cards and the emails and just share a few of those with you To Karen and Christiansburg, tina and Roanoke, dana in low gap and Kathy and Christiansburg.
 
We see you. Strasburg, Kathy didn’t move.
 
0:18:00 – Brian
Sorry, Kathy, you live in, you live in Strasburg. It’s gonna be tough. We see you with your preference for text messages.
 
0:18:08 – Kayla
Yes, we asked a question one week about and I mean overwhelming number of responses about phone calls versus text.
 
0:18:16 – Brian
Don’t call me text, because if I somebody calls me and that they say to me how you doing, you need what is my famous response.
 
0:18:24 – Kayla
Well, why is this not a text?
 
0:18:25 – Brian
Well, you know, this is my response. Well, I’m about to find out how I’m doing because you True, you called.
 
0:18:31 – Kayla
To Sharra in Waynesboro hey, Sharra, we to use FaceTime sometimes and we totally get why that can be a better option.
 
0:18:38 – Brian
I’m not a fan of it.
 
0:18:39 – Kayla
I get your anxiety over taking certain people’s phone calls. So FaceTime I have what. My best friend doesn’t live in town, so getting to FaceTime with her is one of the delights of my week or month, or we’re so busy now that it feels like it’s monthly, but yeah oh, you do you this next one is for you. Ron we need to talk.
 
0:19:03 – Brian
Okay, there’s a famous story in our marriage.
 
0:19:06 – Kayla
We shared it just recently about the pink blanket.
 
0:19:09 – Brian
Yes, and how, before we got married, it wasn’t pink anymore. You were getting the apartment ready.
 
0:19:15 – Kayla
I threw your pink blanket away. It was not so, Ron, it was beige, not pink, had a hole in it the size of my head. Okay, here we go again. So.
 
0:19:26 – Brian
Ron and blunt will respond and said I have a fuzzy, soft pink blanket. I lay on my couch and watch comedy shows or movies. Ron, you’re my favorite person.
 
0:19:36 – Kayla
You’re my new best friend. Okay, good, maybe Ron will share the pink blanket with you.
 
0:19:42 – Brian
No.
 
0:19:44 – Kayla
Sarah, thank you for your beautiful card and Donna, thank you for your kind email. We see you and thank you for sharing the moments that have really spoken to you.
 
0:19:55 – Brian
Yeah, so, and that card was really nice. I was blown away. It was a beautiful card a dawn. We are glad that you’re finding joy and and also in Finding community and what we share. So, and this is a big tent, I mean everybody, come on in, we’ll just sit down absolutely chicken together.
 
0:20:10 – Kayla
To all the friends who’ve shared book suggestions that grasp that Mayo should be spread with an eye, I’ll stop now.
 
0:20:17 – Brian
See, that’s not fair. Godzilla just got in the boat.
 
0:20:20 – Kayla
Oh did he? He did.
 
0:20:22 – Brian
We just discussed that a few weeks back. You spread may one time. I know it wasn’t a wonderful.
 
0:20:27 – Kayla
No, I wasted Mayo. We don’t have time for this. Waste me. To those who text us saying I can Totally see this happening to y’all, well, or thank you for being real. We appreciate you as well. We do and we love hearing from all of you. So yes, if you would like to win. Yes, a coffee mug or some stickers and we have some coming soon. We’re gonna have some new surprise and lights Well just go to our website, look for the trivia button.
 
0:20:59 – Brian
You go to peas and carrots podcast calm that’s our website, peas and carrots podcast calm and you click on the trivia button and you have to answer this question this week.
 
0:21:09 – Kayla
So our question this week is which is your favorite? Do you prefer sunrises or sunsets? As we’re coming into daylight savings time now, and some people are going to prefer the start of the day and some people are going to prefer the end of the day. So you used to be a night owl. I’ve become a morning person.
 
0:21:30 – Brian
Yeah.
 
0:21:30 – Kayla
I still don’t like people in the morning, but I like the mornings.
 
0:21:38 – Brian
It’s there one particular? Is there one particular people that gets on your nerves?
 
0:21:42 – Kayla
No, not just people in general before coffee, because I’m usually the only one in the house at that time of the morning. Well, but you don’t talk early in the morning, and if you do, I tell you what’s the rule about Lincoln stories.
 
0:21:52 – Brian
This morning, I got up and I asked about three or four questions and this head slowly turns. It’s about 4:15 this morning, “B it’s a little early for 20 questions.”
 
0:22:05 – Kayla
I hadn’t had a full cup of coffee. Anywho, we digress. Search peasandcarrotspodcast.com. Answer that trivia question and we will send you a mug and some stickers.
 
0:22:18 – Brian
She loves the stickers. She thinks they’re cute.
 
0:22:19 – Kayla
Oh, they’re absolutely adorable.
 
0:22:22 – Brian
Hey, thanks for listening, and you can search the Peas and Parrot…
 
0:22:25 – Kayla
Peas and Parrots… He needs some coffee.
 
0:22:29 – Brian
Peas and Carrots Podcast.
 
0:22:31 – Kayla
Wherever you get your podcast or visit our website peasandcarrotspodcast.com and when you do, please don’t forget to subscribe to the podcast.
 
0:22:39 – Brian
You can also follow us on Facebook and Instagram. Just search for the Peas and Carrots Podcast.
 
0:22:45 – Kayla
I blame Godzilla. You wouldn’t have said Parrots if he wasn’t sitting there.
 
0:22:49 – Brian
He is not bothering anybody.
 
0:22:51 – Kayla
Little bit.
 
0:22:51 – Brian
No! “A little bit…”
 
0:22:53 – Announcer
For more about the Peas and Carrots Podcast and to reach out to Brian and Kayla, visit peasandcarrotspodcast.com. Life’s not perfect. That’s why God gave us friends like Melody and Candi. Check out QuirksBumpsandBruises.com, or search Quirks, Bumps, and Bruises wherever you listen to podcasts.

 

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