Season 3, Episode 19: Empty Nesters

Can We Talk?
Empty Nesters - Episode Description

Kayla can barely hold back her excitement about hugging Winnie the Pooh during our upcoming Disney vacation, and Brian finds himself humorously torn about whether to use the resort gym amidst all the walking. As we share our daily routines, from Kayla’s involvement in a women’s summer study at church to Brian’s newfound joy in grilling on a spotless grill, the conversation takes a heartfelt turn. We candidly explore the emotional complexities of Father’s Day, especially when faced with infertility and the reality of being empty nesters. We reflect on how certain holidays can be particularly challenging without children in the family, making this a deeply personal and relatable discussion.

We delve into themes of faith and gratitude, sharing touching stories about our experiences with other “children” God has given us and their profound impact on our lives. Amid these emotional moments, we lighten the atmosphere by discussing our favorite fictional characters and books, debating the age-old question of reading the book before watching the movie, and sharing our thoughts on Disney parks. We also spill the beans on our fears, future plans for getting a dog, and foods we absolutely refuse to eat. This episode is a rollercoaster of emotions, filled with laughter, love, and unexpected insights that will keep you engaged from start to finish.

Empty Nesters - Transcript

0:00:00 – Announcer

We go together like Peas and Carrots. The Peas and Carrots Podcast, sharing life from our piece of the vegetable patch, Brian and Kayla Sanders. 

 

0:00:11 – Brian

Welcome to the peas and carrots podcast. Hi, I’m Kayla and I’m Brian. Welcome to this week’s edition of the vegetable patch. I’ll tell you y’all, let’s just start here. Why are you so excited? 

 

0:00:25 – Kayla

The countdown is on. Countdown four we are leaving for vacation in a few days. 

 

0:00:32 – Brian

She’s got her little hands out in front of her like a little girl and she’s swinging them back and forth. 

 

0:00:38 – Kayla

Yeah, it’s vacation time. 

 

0:00:41 – Brian

Now, who are you going to see? 

 

0:00:43 – Kayla

Winnie the Pooh, Tigger, Eeyore Piglet. 

 

0:00:49 – Brian

Mickey Minnie, you sound like an eight-year-old you going to hug Winnie the Pooh? Yes, absolutely. You going to hug Mickey Mouse, probably. 

 

0:01:00 – Kayla

Okay, I mean maybe not, I don’t know, Donald Duck, and I mean they’re all right, but you don’t like Donald, I do. 

 

0:01:10 – Brian

But you love Winnie. 

 

0:01:10 – Kayla

But I love Winnie the Pooh. Okay To me All right. But yeah, we are headed south for vacation. We are, and I’m so ready. 

 

0:01:20 – Brian

I talked to my friend who lives down there. He said to bring shorts. 

 

0:01:23 – Kayla

He says it’s hot yeah, it’s 98 degrees the day we land. 

 

0:01:26 – Brian

So a little bit toasty. Miss Sanders is outside of her comfort zone and God’s using you, I’ll say that because last night you started what. 

 

0:01:38 – Kayla

We started our women’s summer study at church and it was really sweet sitting in a room with about gosh, I don’t know probably 30 women who, seeing them huddled in groups talking about just life and their journey with Jesus, and it was pretty amazing. It took me a while to wind down. I’m a little tired today because it was after 11 o’clock before all the adrenaline left my body. 

 

0:02:07 – Brian

I was asleep by then. 

 

0:02:09 – Kayla

But I actually had to like people and talk, stand up in front of the group. 

 

0:02:14 – Brian

It didn’t kill me. So proud of you. Why? Thank you. God’s using you. 

 

0:02:21 – Kayla

You are a very, very happy man. 

 

0:02:23 – Brian

I am because I’m grilling again. You are a very, very happy man. I am because I’m grilling again. My beautiful bride this past weekend cleaned my grill for me. It really wasn’t bad. I would like to clean my grill, but this is a conversation. My standards of what is clean is different from other people’s standards and we’ll leave other people undefined at this time. Good choice, okay. Yeah, so miss sanders cleaned my grill for me. I did, and you’ve. 

 

0:02:53 – Kayla

I’ve planted all the flowers, and so the back deck is your little sanctuary. Oh, I love it you can sit out there I grilled us some steaks, grilled some chicken last night. 

 

0:03:03 – Brian

So it’s just chicken last night. I’m a happy, happy, happy boy. Summer is in full swing. 

 

0:03:09 – Kayla

I’m excited, so I may have floated an idea with you. Here we go, that while we were on vacation our Hang on Before we get this out. 

 

0:03:19 – Brian

The answer is no. The answer is no, but go ahead. The answer is maybe. The answer is no, our go ahead. 

 

0:03:24 – Kayla

Go ahead. The answer is maybe the answer is no, our resort has a really nice gym. 

 

0:03:30 – Brian

Okay, let’s stop here. Okay, how many miles a day are we going to be walking at Disney? A lot, seven to eight. I do not see the need to go. 

 

0:03:42 – Kayla

But we could do some of our strength training. 

 

0:03:43 – Brian

No, no, I just still haven’t recovered from the to go, but we could do some of our strength training no no. I just still haven’t recovered from the look on your face by about 12 noon or 1 o’clock we’ll be strength training dragging my tail from here to get a Dole Whip ice cream across the thing in Hollywood Studios. 

 

0:03:57 – Kayla

That’s my strength training, okay good to know, so it’s a maybe. 

 

0:04:02 – Brian

No, it’s not a maybe. I will stretch forth a hand and pray for you as you go to the gym, while I lay in bed. 

 

0:04:09 – Kayla

In all seriousness, though, what is the gym next to at our resort? What is right next door to the gym? Ice cream, an ice cream store? 

 

0:04:18 – Brian

I will walk by you with an ice cream I’ll wave at you. I’ll even watch you. It doesn’t, no, but if I’m walking eight miles a day, I am not going to the gym. Okay, in 98-degree weather. So maybe I’ll have sweat rolling in places I haven’t seen in three years. Bless America, so that’s a hard pass for me. Are you really going to go to the gym on vacation? Maybe, Maybe I don’t believe it. I do not believe it. Best laid plans y’all Best laid plans. 

 

0:04:59 – Kayla

Forever empty nesters. It’s a good this is a good topic, but a hard topic Again, being that this is coming up on Father’s Day and that is a complicated holiday for you. You had a wonderful dad. 

 

0:05:17 – Brian

I had a great dad I mean the best ever, even wrote a book about him called Be Like Dad, which you can find on Amazon, by the way. But this is a tough holiday for me, and we’ve talked about this before on this podcast. We’ve talked about infertility. We never were able to have children and we were in that time period where we didn’t adopt either. Okay, let’s just be honest. And now, being 56, don’t take this wrong I don’t want a kid in my house. I’m too old, I’m setting my ways and I’m cranky. I want to go to bed about eight, 30. Okay, I’m just because by the time that kid’s coming out of diapers, I’ll be going into them. So I just say it. But Father’s Day and Mother’s Day are hard days. 

 

0:06:07 – Kayla

Yeah. 

 

0:06:08 – Brian

And sometimes Christmas Day can be hard. 

 

0:06:11 – Kayla

Yeah, Because you see all these pictures of families snuggled up on the sofa in their matching pajamas and they’re doing all these things together. 

 

0:06:22 – Brian

But as many of our friends, it’s just me and you, which is great, it’s wonderful. 

 

0:06:26 – Kayla

Yeah, we are a family. Yeah, but we were saying the other night, as it comes up on Father’s Day, there are so many of our friends entering the stage of life where they are becoming grandparents. We are reminded that life looks different for us. 

 

0:06:43 – Brian

Not bad, but different and we’re not asking you to feel sorry for us or something like that. No, we’re just sharing our struggle, how we’ve seen Christ be sufficient. Let me say it absolutely yeah. Let me say it like that yeah, there is no pity here. 

 

0:07:01 – Kayla

There is no woe is us, there is a may. We all remember each other’s situation, that our situation is also not the same as our single friends, and then our situation is not the same as those who would long to have an evening with a quiet home. So, yeah, it’s again. It’s different is not bad. It just means that we embrace a different reality. 

 

0:07:32 – Brian

Now. So let me just say this we’re never going to have a home that has grandkids squealing in it. 

 

0:07:38 – Kayla

Yeah. 

 

0:07:39 – Brian

Their parents begging us not to spoil them. But I guarantee you we would. 

 

0:07:43 – Kayla

Oh, absolutely. 

 

0:07:44 – Brian

I mean, I’d take them to Target and whatever they pointed at, I’d buy it. 

 

0:07:47 – Kayla

Yep, I have no doubt. 

 

0:07:50 – Brian

But let me say this we also have a history. Whenever we lived in New Orleans 20 years ago, we mentored college, we mentored seminary students and every Thursday night there’d be 10, 15 students in our home. 

 

0:08:09 – Kayla

Yeah. 

 

0:08:10 – Brian

And when we moved here to Virginia, we just continued that tradition. We brought college students in our home and there were Thursday nights when we were here in Virginia, where there’d be 20 students in our home.

 

0:08:24 – Kayla

Yeah. 

 

0:08:24 – Brian

And many of them called us mom and dad. 

 

0:08:27 – Kayla

And that was a real privilege to get to do life with them. So a typical Thursday, and again this started in New Orleans with seminary students who were single, lonely. They were part of our church but they did not have a home outside of church. They were really struggling some of them. So we would have dinner together and then we would spend probably 30 to 45 minutes talking about something theologically related. 

 

0:08:56 – Brian

We’d have a Bible study. 

 

0:08:57 – Kayla

And then we watched Survivor. It was a tradition that everyone would kind of choose who they thought was going to win Survivor and we would watch that together and then, honestly, some Thursdays at like 11 o’clock, we would say, okay, you people have to go home, we have to go to bed. 

 

0:09:14 – Brian

And it was always a race to see who could be there first Thursday night because they’d bring their laundry. 

 

0:09:18 – Kayla

Yeah. 

 

0:09:19 – Brian

And so they would always bring laundry. 

 

0:09:21 – Kayla

I’ve taught many a young man and young woman how to sort clothes. Well, I’m up for that lesson. So, yeah, no, you’re good you leave our laundry alone. 

 

0:09:31 – Brian

We also had a rule in New Orleans that Friday night was like date night. 

 

0:09:35 – Kayla

Yeah, our home was opened. Honestly, Thursday night was not the only night that they could visit, but Friday night was off limits. And I think we’ve shared this before. 

 

0:09:44 – Brian

We’ve shared this story before. How I jokingly said, Friday night’s off limits, I said now, if you show up at midnight, that’s okay, that’s Saturday, that is off limits. I said now, if you show up at midnight, that’s okay, that’s Saturday. 

 

0:09:56 – Kayla

I never thought anybody would show up at 12.01 am. 

 

0:09:57 – Brian

DR Randall shows up at our door. 

 

0:10:01 – Kayla

Are y’all awake? Yeah, son, what’s up? 

 

0:10:05 – Brian

Well, you said we could stop by after 12. Well, what am I going to do? Come on in. 

 

0:10:12 – Kayla

You’re going to watch a movie, and that’s what you did. I think I fell asleep, yeah, but he was happy. So, yes, we have had a bounty of a really rich life with students who not only have we had a chance to pour into them, they’ve poured into us, and we now have young men and women who have families of their own and we get to delight in seeing them going through different stages with their kids, and they are incredible parents and it’s been fun watching various ones of them get married and then have kids and settling down and buying their first home. 

 

The call that we get of. I mean, I’ve lost count of the number of young men in particular that have said hey, would you all meet us for dinner? It’s important that you meet my fiancé, or hey, there was one in particular. We were sworn to secrecy that there was going to be a proposal, but it was important to him that we meet her beforehand. So different is not always bad, but here’s the reality that we are in. They have all grown and flown, as parents would say, and genuinely as they should. They have their grown and flown, as parents would say, and and genuinely as they should. They have their families to go to when, when Christmas rolls around, when easter hits, when they go and spend time with their biological parents, and that is exactly how it should be. Now we have been surprised and delighted on many a holiday where we’ve gotten a text saying hey, we’re in town, Can we get together? Can we visit Now? 

 

0:12:02 – Brian

I need to be honest. I’m just going to be very vulnerable. It still hurts some Sure. After all these years it still stings that kids and grandkids that they never show up, that kids and grandkids that they never show up. So I’m trying to grow in this to be satisfied with him. 

 

0:12:19 – Kayla

Yeah. 

 

0:12:20 – Brian

Because he is to be my portion. 

 

0:12:23 – Kayla

Yeah. 

 

0:12:23 – Brian

I am to taste and see the Lord is good. I’m not to taste and see what I wish I had. I’m to taste and see that he is good. Yeah, so that’s what I’m trying to do. 

 

0:12:37 – Kayla

And I will admit as well that there are times that that familiar ache returns, never knowing what it’s going to feel like to carry another human, never getting to answer questions such as okay, whose eye color would he have? Whose personality would she emulate? How tall would he be? What would she be when she grows up? I mean, these are questions that we’ll never have an answer, and yet the Lord has been faithful to fill our lives beyond full, just not with children of our own. And yet I also, at this stage in my life, I see friends of ours who they have raised children and then, for various reasons, their children have kind of gone their own way and so pouring out as a parent for 20 plus years, and then your child kind of turns and veers off, and I cannot imagine that heartache. And so everything is a little complicated. When you really stop and think about it, life is not just cut and dry. 

 

0:13:51 – Brian

No, I’ve come to this realization is that what they sell you in movies is a lie. It’s never that beautiful. It’s never that peaceful and it’s never where you get to put a bow on it and say life is perfect, it’s never like that. 

 

0:14:05 – Kayla

So I do worry. 

 

0:14:08 – Brian

Shock. 

 

0:14:09 – Kayla

I know what if god takes me first really that’s always been something that no, no this is something that plagues me and I worry that if god took me first, if we’d had kids, I could know that you had loved ones who were going to take care of you upon my passing, and that’s always plagued me a little bit. 

 

0:14:33 – Brian

That plagues me as well, because your worry is my worry. I mean I get up at 2 o’clock in the morning to go do what 56-year-old men do at that time of the morning and I come back to lay down and those things start. I mean it keeps me awake. Like you know, if I don’t wake up in the morning, she’s alone. There’s nobody there, and so I try to yeah. That’s why church, community and that kind of stuff sometimes is important, because now I don’t want to leave, tomorrow I’d like to have another. 

 

0:15:03 – Kayla

Yeah, please don’t. 

 

0:15:04 – Brian

I’d like to have another 20, 30 years with you. Yeah, as long as I can get around well, but I do worry about that. But I have to trust that the God who’s gotten us this far, he will be faithful to get us home. Yeah so. 

 

0:15:18 – Kayla

Yeah, and another beauty in this is we can see that God continues to surround us with couples. They’re beginning their journey. We can encourage them, we can support them, we can help them to see that it won’t always be this hard. But I may not ever fully understand his ways. I know enough of him that I can assure that younger couple that God is good and I can share with them, that he can be trusted and that he’s faithful and he’s true, and that his plans for them are way better than any plans we could ever have of our own. 

 

0:16:03 – Brian

I didn’t think I was going to cry today. You’re just ripping my heart out. You’re just ripping my heart out. I guess I got a little bit further to go than you. I would tell those couples that he’s true and he’s faithful and he’s loving and he’s caring. But part of your life might also be a little bit of bitter profit, because God doesn’t always operate. 

 

0:16:29 – Kayla

But hopefully that will drive you closer to him. Gotta get a Kleenex. 

 

0:16:35 – Brian

I wasn’t expecting this today. I mean here you roll up in here. So sorry, now my mascara’s running Stop. Will I ever be 100%? Okay with this? I’m trying. 

 

0:16:54 – Kayla

Yeah. 

 

0:16:55 – Brian

I am trying, but I’m thankful for Jesus. I’m thankful for you, darling, I mean it. I’m also thankful for all the kids who’ve passed through our home kids who’ve? 

 

passed through our home, yeah, I mean. And when they’re in town, they make a point to see us and introduce us to all their littles. And some of them they’ll call us and they’ll say Mom, Dad, we’re expecting baby number five. And I’m like, look, y’all need to figure out what’s causing this and stop it. You’re on five or six now, okay, so, but we love it. But I just want to say this what you just said deeply impacted me. I’m trying yeah. 

 

And I can tell couples that he’s faithful and he’s good, and I’ll do a better job of that. So that’s too much for me. Thank you, getting to know you. 

 

0:17:54 – Kayla

Yeah, okay, that was pretty heavy, so we need a little lighthearted. 

 

0:18:00 – Brian

I’m still wiping tears in my eyes. Yeah, I need a candy bar Piece of fried chicken. All right, what you got. 

 

0:18:10 – Kayla

Just a few questions about us. Some of these we get from people and some of these that I came up with on my own Just to kind of let them get to know us just a little bit better. Who is your favorite fictional character? 

 

0:18:23 – Brian

Darth Vader or Godzilla? Quick answer, or can I give one more? Sure? Willy Wonka, oh good one. Gene Wilder yeah, you favorite fictional character. 

 

0:18:36 – Kayla

Mine would be Mary Poppins. 

 

0:18:40 – Brian

Practically perfect in every way. 

 

0:18:42 – Kayla

Or, of course, any of the Winnie the Pooh characters. 

 

0:18:45 – Brian

I don’t understand Al. I don’t even know why he’s in the mix. He’s wise. No, he’s not, he’s crazy. 

 

0:18:51 – Kayla

Oh Well, all right then Best book you have read to date? 

 

0:18:58 – Brian

This year To date Best book Not this year. 

 

0:19:00 – Kayla

Just To date Best book Not this year just To date, unreasonable Hospitality. 

 

0:19:06 – Brian

Oh, phenomenal, phenomenal book, loved it you. 

 

0:19:14 – Kayla

The Diary of Anne Frank Wow. 

 

0:19:17 – Brian

That’s gone a little bit back. 

 

0:19:19 – Kayla

Okay, I’ve read some good books, but that one still impacts me more than I think any other. I mean not including the bible, but yeah somebody’s going to somebody gonna be like you people need some Jesus. Will you ever get another dog? We get this question a lot the answer is yes, okay we’re just not in a season to have a dog we’re not. 

 

0:19:42 – Brian

We’re way too busy and we wouldn’t be home enough. 

 

0:19:46 – Kayla

We are typically home two, two and a half hours a night, and that would be well. Let me clarify that. 

 

0:19:54 – Brian

Hang on, where are we sleeping? 

 

0:19:55 – Kayla

Before we go to sleep. That would just seem very selfish at this stage of our life, but we do. We have plans to get another dog. What are you most afraid of? 

 

0:20:09 – Brian

How honest do I want to be? 

 

0:20:10 – Kayla

Oh, you have to tell the truth or I will. 

 

0:20:13 – Brian

Spiders and being alone. 

 

0:20:16 – Kayla

Getting lost because it’s happened before. 

 

0:20:21 – Brian

Yes, yes, getting. 

 

0:20:23 – Kayla

I cannot handle feeling lost or not knowing where I’m going.

 

0:20:26 – Brian

That GPS takes this all throughout. Oh, I freak out. 

 

0:20:29 – Kayla

So what has to be first for you the book or the movie? 

 

0:20:33 – Brian

I really don’t care. Oh really. Yeah, I’ve never read the Harry Potter books. I’ve seen the movies 50 times a piece, though. 

 

0:20:41 – Kayla

What. 

 

0:20:43 – Brian

I’ve never read Chronicles of Narnia. I’ve watched those crappy movies too. Rude. Well, they got trees walking in them. 

 

0:20:54 – Kayla

And yet Godzilla is okay. This is where we are. Are we going to do this. 

 

0:21:02 – Brian

I feel a little judged. I didn’t criticize. 

 

0:21:06 – Kayla

We need to poo and you called chronicles of Narnia crappy. 

 

0:21:11 – Brian

Well it’s not my cup of tea. 

 

0:21:13 – Kayla

Well, okay, Godzilla’s not mine, but he’s awesome. Anyway, your punishment is you will now read the first Narnia book. 

 

0:21:21 – Brian

I am not Yep, I will go to book jail. I am not reading that Book jail. I am not reading that. 

 

0:21:27 – Kayla

Favorite Disney part. 

 

0:21:28 – Brian

No, you got to answer that Book or movie. 

 

0:21:30 – Kayla

Oh, I have to read the book first, really, because then I want to compare to see how true they stay to the book when I watch the movie. Why is that important? It matters to me. Maybe if you’d read the Chronicles of Narnia. You would like the movies have you ever read it. 

 

0:21:46 – Brian

Yes, all of them my uncle gifted me this set you read all that Prince Caspian stuff and all that. 

 

0:21:52 – Kayla

Yes, I did. Walking it back a little bit now. 

 

0:21:55 – Brian

No, I’m just because Carol Lass again take me to book jail. 

 

0:22:01 – Kayla

Favorite Disney park. 

 

0:22:03 – Brian

Hollywood Studios Easy Hollywood Studios. 

 

0:22:08 – Kayla

It’s a toss-up between Hollywood Studios and Epcot for me, because Epcot has the International Village and I love that. 

 

0:22:16 – Brian

You love the English village. I love all of it Fish and Chip. They have a little tea shop there in the English village. You like that. 

 

0:22:25 – Kayla

What is a food you refuse to eat? 

 

0:22:29 – Brian

Mushrooms, Brussels sprouts. Unless they’re doused in garlic and bacon. I’m not going to touch a Brussels sprout. If you can still taste Brussels, I ain’t touching the sprout. 

 

0:22:40 – Kayla

Yeah, it’s not happening. Probably okra. Oh yeah, ain’t touching this brown. Yeah, it’s not happening. Probably okra, oh yeah. 

 

0:22:47 – Brian

Mushy okra, yeah, bell peppers. 

 

0:22:49 – Kayla

Okay. We don’t have to list all of them. 

 

0:22:51 – Brian

Oh, sorry yeah. 

 

0:22:52 – Kayla

Okay, what is your Enneagram? 

 

0:22:55 – Brian

I’m an eight with a seven wing. 

 

0:22:57 – Kayla

And I’m a one with a two wing, and none of that surprises anybody who’s listening. A one with a two wing, and none of that surprises anybody who’s listening. So yeah, but there we are. So those are just some random questions about us. Speaking of questions, the first two people to go to our website and answer the question correctly, you will win a peas and carrots coffee mug what is this week’s trivia question? 

 

0:23:19 – Brian

so, our. 

 

0:23:20 – Kayla

Our question is book or movie which comes first for you? Do you have to read? 

 

0:23:27 – Brian

the book first, or I mean it doesn’t matter it’s just an honest answer. They can say I don’t care, but so hey, if you go to our website, the first few people go to our website. Answer that question correctly yeah, so book or movie. You’ll win a peas and carrots coffee mug, a good pack of Cute little stickers, and then we’ve added a pen a peas and carrots it’s very, very nice. They just came in. 

 

0:23:54 – Kayla

So click that trivia button. Answer that question. Peasandcarrotspodcast.com. You can search Peas and Carrots Podcast wherever you get your podcasts, or visit our website peasandcarrotspodcast.com. When you do, don’t forget to subscribe to the podcast. 

 

0:24:09 – Brian

You can follow us on Facebook and Instagram. Just search for the Peas and Carrots Podcast. See you all later. I’m off to book jail. 

 

0:24:18 – Announcer

For more about the Peas and Carrots Podcast and to reach out to Brian and Kayla, visit peasandcarrotspodcast.com. Growing through the challenges we face and finding hope along the way. That’s the Jesus Fix It Podcast with Jess. Check out jesusfixit.com or search Jesus Fix It wherever you listen to podcasts. 

 

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Season 3, Episode 1: “Wait, What?”

"Wait,What?" - Episode Description

Happy New Year! Welcome back for Season 3 of the Peas and Carrots podcast! Brian and Kayla kick off this episode by sharing all about their Christmas break and the hilarious things they heard people say over the holidays. Then Brian and Kayla dive into an inspiring discussion about what they will be setting down as they leave 2023, and what they are carrying in to 2024. Also, listen in for a surprise visit from Godzilla!

 

"Wait,What?" - Transcript

 00:00:00 – Announcer
We go together like peas and carrots! The Peas and Carrots Podcast, sharing life from our piece of the vegetable patch Brian and Kayla Sanders.

0:00:11 – Brian
Welcome to season three of the Peas and Carrots Podcast. Hello, I’m Brian. I’m Kayla and Season three miss. I’m peas and I’m, I’m carrots.

0:00:24 – Kayla
This is who we are.

0:00:25 – Brian
This is who we are. So if you want to find out more, go back and listen to the old episode. We there. You just gonna say okay, so Welcome to season.

0:00:35 – Kayla
This is who we are.

0:00:37 – Brian
You know, we ain’t gonna explain ourselves to you people one of us would, but never mind.

0:00:42 – Kayla
So Well, who of us?

0:00:44 – Brian
Would you think you me? She’s the kinder of the two of us.

0:00:47 – Kayla
No, that’s not what I was saying.

0:00:50 – Brian
It doesn’t matter if you say I’m into details.

0:00:53 – Kayla
I will put it that way so okay before we digress, what’s up in the world of peas and carrots?

0:00:59 – Brian
well, we had a peaceful and relaxing Christmas.

0:01:04 – Kayla
We did.

0:01:07 – Brian
I am thankful for that.

0:01:09 – Kayla
It was we had the Friday off before the holiday and the Monday after for Christmas, of course, and, and I should say the weekend, the Friday before, the weekend, the Monday after, and it was four days of just Snacks and movies and reading Christmas story naps.

0:01:32 – Brian
Yeah, it was good, so it was great, and We’ve picked up a new hobby.

0:01:39 – Kayla
I shouldn’t say new, we picked this back up we used to do this all the time we’re working puzzles and we’re puzzling.

0:01:47 – Brian
So, and I get aggravated.

0:01:50 – Kayla
And, I get so tickled at you. This is hard.

0:01:53 – Brian
Like no, and then you say I do something else when we’re puzzling, like I’ll be sitting, you grunt.

0:01:58 – Kayla
It is the funniest thing I don’t hear myself like what you just kind of go. Then it’s when you’re trying to figure something out. You’ll just be trying to piece things together and you go Over and over and over.

0:02:12 – Brian
So we actually have a puzzle at home. We do, and we also have one at the office.

0:02:17 – Kayla
So what started this is. I was reading about ways to Enjoy winter instead of enduring it, and one of those was to tap into things that give you comfort. So I started brainstorming what are some things that, at work, we can do during breaks and downtime? So I just brought a puzzle and I watched the number of team members who have come through our office and just sat down For ten minutes to work the puzzle. I thought, okay, we’re on to something here. And then you told me I’d really like to do a puzzle at home.

So, this weekend we picked up some puzzles.

0:02:55 – Brian
We finished a star, would you like. Star Wars was our first on it. It’s really hard.

0:03:00 – Kayla
Yeah, I and you buy these 500. So we’re going to do another 500 piece puzzle Right.

0:03:05 – Brian
And so when I hear 500 piece, I’m thinking like kitty. And these are not kitty puzzles no no. It kind of aggravate me a little bit. So, ladies and gentlemen, it has begun. So at the time of this recording, there’s chatter about a potential winter storm.

0:03:23 – Kayla
There is potentially Saturday, anywhere from one inch of snow to 10 inches of snow, depending on who you’re listening to.

0:03:30 – Brian
Yes, so yeah, stay tuned. Now I’m going to say this I don’t mind if it snows, I don’t want to be trapped in no house for three days. We’ve got puzzles. I will not be trapped in that house for three days. I will go nuts.

0:03:43 – Kayla
We’ve got puzzles and snacks. Is that better?

0:03:46 – Brian
Like snacks.

0:03:47 – Kayla
There we go.

0:03:48 – Brian
All about snacks.

0:03:52 – Kayla
So we thought we’d have a little fun.

0:03:53 – Brian
She has been so excited about this topic.

0:03:56 – Kayla
She has talked about Going into the holiday I told B I want you to make note of and we did not compare notes before today, but I said I want you to make note of things that you heard or were said over the holidays.

0:04:10 – Brian
I’m just talking about some of what you have written. I said some of these things.

0:04:14 – Kayla
Yeah, you did.

0:04:16 – Brian
That’s wrong.

0:04:17 – Kayla
No, it’s not, so go ahead explain what we’re doing here. There’s may have been broken. You know it’s the holiday, so let’s keep that in mind. But, for example, I overheard the following the weekend before Christmas Any exciting weekend plans? And the response was we’re getting two new toilets for Christmas. You wanted to die, oh my gosh. Well we did get two new toilets for Christmas.

Not for Christmas. Before Christmas, I asked you to please stop telling people that we bought each other a toilet for Christmas. They were pricey. I don’t care, they were not our Christmas presents.

0:05:00 – Brian
I couldn’t find a way to wrap them up, though, so all right, apparently, I said the next one you did. Okay, how’s your leg? Have you thought about putting febrize on it? And I say that a lot.

0:05:17 – Kayla
You meant to say biofries, biofries, but I guess you wanted my leg to be fresh and I don’t know.

0:05:24 – Brian
Well, you don’t stink, I don’t, but I don’t know why I say febrize. But, I got tickled at that. And if you do febrize. I like that, I like the apple cranberry scent.

0:05:33 – Kayla
Okay, good to know, I really say febrize, you said febrize, you did.

0:05:37 – Brian
Well, I got tickled at that Be like that old fella in that big fat Greek wedding.

0:05:41 – Kayla
Windex, windex, windex.

0:05:44 – Brian
On your hip. That’ll fix it.

0:05:46 – Kayla
Actually said, no reference needed. I try not to be a cranky old man, but people get on my nerves.

0:05:56 – Brian
I’m guessing I said that, did I say?

0:05:59 – Kayla
that you did.

0:06:00 – Brian
Well, I’m coming to learn that people don’t have to get on my nerves to be a cranky old man. Oh, all right, I think I’m just cranky. Okay, so that’s just me, okay.

0:06:15 – Kayla
I may have said this one.

0:06:17 – Brian
Okay, is this a glimpse into our retirement years, drinking hot tea and working puzzles?

0:06:23 – Kayla
I just kind of felt like a retirement home.

0:06:26 – Brian
Well, you put that for breeze, that bio freeze on you. I said it there to give you Put that bio freeze.

0:06:32 – Kayla
Bio freeze and we’ve got it lit.

0:06:35 – Brian
And you’ll and we’ll smell like the ward at a nursing home. So where’s that?

0:06:42 – Kayla
Getting a head start. So, may have said I’ve decided I’m not going off the rails with my eating this Christmas. I’ll never forget that. My grand declaration on like Wednesday.

0:06:57 – Brian
And two days later I hear this you think our daily bread still has Christmas sugar cookies. So I went and bought you six. You did.

0:07:07 – Kayla
I was the proud owner of six.

0:07:08 – Brian
They were massive, they were huge.

0:07:09 – Kayla
I ate one for breakfast every day.

0:07:12 – Brian
I didn’t have a second.

0:07:12 – Kayla
Well, I can’t have coffee and a sugar cookie. It was heaven.

0:07:15 – Brian
You were in, yeah.

0:07:17 – Kayla
I swear If I have to hear Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer one more time on the radio.

0:07:23 – Brian
All the time that and that rocking around the Christmas tree, and that.

0:07:29 – Kayla
Now disclaimer. You love Christmas music, but there’s a window of time for you.

0:07:34 – Brian
There’s a window of time and have a holly jolly After the 80th time I’m ready to. You know you’re not as holly and jolly I’m sick of it, okay. Man. I really am a cranky old man. I need to pray a little bit more.

0:07:51 – Kayla
This one made me laugh. I had to turn around in the store.

0:07:57 – Brian
We were at Target and we were buying cough syrup because we had to restock something. And we’re buying this cough syrup and the young lady checking us out at Target says sir, I need to see your ID to see if you’re old enough to buy that cough syrup. And she go ahead and she’s serious Like I. First I paused and looked at her, but she was here. My beard is what color, Miss Kayla?

0:08:24 – Kayla
Well, it’s gray and white, it’s gray and white in her defense.

0:08:28 – Brian
She was a newer team member.

0:08:30 – Kayla
I don’t care, she was just doing a job.

0:08:32 – Brian
A monkey can tell me how old I am.

0:08:35 – Kayla
Your next one. We were at Olive Garden and what did you hear?

0:08:40 – Brian
As we were leaving, somebody said wow, that’s a big noodle. They were like I’ve never heard that before at Olive Garden. It’s how you in restaurant.

0:08:51 – Kayla
They weren’t going to be hungry when they were. No, but I mean okay.

0:08:56 – Brian
So we’re in Barnes and Noble, we’re in Barnes and Noble and you’re in your little area and I’m in my area and I usually go to the Christian section and I’m in the Bible section. I like to look at that kind of stuff and there’s a clerk and there’s a customer.

0:09:12 – Kayla
Okay, there’s a service desk right near the Christian section.

0:09:16 – Brian
So at the Barnes and Noble, this customer asked the clerk for an audio book and the clerk says sir, we don’t sell audio books, you download it to your phone. The customer said I have it on my phone, I can listen to it on my phone, I just want the audio so I can take it anywhere. Now it’s at that point. I tune in because this cat Hold up a second yes, he says I have it on my phone.

Take your phone with you, exactly. And the clerk, who is now confused, says sir, if you have on your phone, you can take it anywhere. And the guy says well, what if I lose my phone? Like I’m trying hard not to stare, like is this, like I’m thinking I’m on an episode of something, okay? He says what if I lose my phone? I still want the audio version. The clerk says if you sync it across devices, then you can listen to it on any device. And the customer says I guess I’m after. What I’m after is the audio, so I can take it anywhere. Now here’s my. Does this guy think that the audio can fit in your hand? Like?

0:10:24 – Kayla
in his defense.

0:10:26 – Brian
No, no, there is no defense. Stop it. You’re being too nice to people. Stop it.

0:10:32 – Kayla
I’m wondering if he meant like with a kindle or something. Well, kindles don’t have audio, do they?

0:10:40 – Brian
Probably but, he’s got a phone.

0:10:41 – Kayla
Okay, you’re getting a little wound up about this.

0:10:44 – Brian
You go in there and you ask for an audio book.

0:10:46 – Kayla
Okay, Walter, we’re moving on now.

0:10:49 – Brian
I don’t appreciate. Do you want to tell people why you call me Walter?

0:10:53 – Kayla
Because sometimes you act like a cranky old man. And there’s the mannequin.

0:10:57 – Brian
There’s the Jeff Dunham and puppet that he calls Walter.

0:11:01 – Kayla
We were out to dinner on New Year’s Eve.

0:11:02 – Brian
Well, I’m not done with this fella. No, we’re done.

0:11:04 – Kayla
No, we’re done. We’re done with this fella. We’re moving on. New Year’s Eve, fast forward, wonderful dinner. You ordered the prime rib, you have this. They brought out half a cow.

0:11:13 – Brian
I asked how big the steak was. Seriously, I wanted to be too big and he said 10 ounces. It was huge that steak had to be.

0:11:20 – Kayla
You got three meals out of it.

0:11:22 – Brian
It was massive y’all, and so I couldn’t eat any of all of it. I had to eat about a third of it, okay.

0:11:29 – Kayla
Yeah.

0:11:31 – Brian
Well, when they deliver it now we’ve struck up a conversation and a friendship with the owner during this time they deliver the prime rib and the owner walks by and he goes, ooh, says you’re the first customer to have ordered that this evening. I’m looking forward. I’m excited to see you eat that. Now, wait a minute. I ain’t going to sit here and let you watch me eat this, but I’d sit there and eat it. He’d come by and he’d fist bump me and that kind of stuff.

0:11:54 – Kayla
But he wanted to make sure you were enjoying your meal. So we did. We sent our best regards to the chefs they had done an amazing job and to our friends who live in the New River Valley or even if you’re within like an hour or two of Christiansburg, go to Bull and Bones in Christiansburg.

0:12:11 – Brian
It’s incredible you will enjoy it was amazing, your meal.

0:12:15 – Kayla
It was stellar.

0:12:17 – Brian
You had filet medallions.

0:12:19 – Kayla
I got filet medallions with grilled shrimp and sweet potato casserole.

0:12:23 – Brian
They were in a garlic butter sauce.

0:12:26 – Kayla
Yeah. So, and sweet potatoes and broccoli.

0:12:30 – Brian
It was good.

0:12:30 – Kayla
It was very, very good.

0:12:31 – Brian
It was. I’ll just tell you that the Bull and Bones in Christiansburg had a thing going. It was called Old Farts, new Year’s Eve, okay, and they were going to drop a ball Toasting at 9 pm yeah. Toast at 9 o’clock and drop this ball at 9 o’clock, so everybody go home and go to bed Now. Our reservations were at 7.

0:12:48 – Kayla
We made it to 8.30. Okay, then went home.

0:12:52 – Brian
Right, because we live two minutes from the restaurant.

0:12:54 – Kayla
Yeah. So, yeah, it was fun. I mean yeah, it was great.

0:12:58 – Brian
I’d say go to Bull and Bones.

0:12:59 – Kayla
Yes, definitely give them a chance.

0:13:04 – Brian
All right, it’s time to get serious.

0:13:06 – Kayla
Just for a minute.

0:13:07 – Brian
Okay.

0:13:08 – Kayla
But we welcome you to join us in this.

0:13:10 – Brian
Okay.

0:13:12 – Kayla
There’s a lot of things coming out of 2023. You’re seeing it, whether people want to call it their intentions or their goals, or they want to talk about, Resolutions.

Their word for the year, or we’re kind of putting a different spin on this, because for us, honestly, for the first time in a long time, you and I have chosen a word for the year. We feel God leading us in a certain direction. That’s not what we’re going to share today, though. We’ve been asking each other this question, I guess technically two questions what are we setting down as we leave 2023? What are we hoping to leave in 2023?nAnd what are we carrying into 2024? And so we just something to think about. If you’re really struggling with, well, I don’t have goals, I don’t have resolutions, it’s not a bad thing, but what are some things in your mind and in your heart? You know, I need to put this down and leave it there, and in 2024, I’m going to pick this up and carry it. So be give us an example.

0:14:27 – Brian
I’m going to put down that everyone has to love and accept me. I’m going to leave that behind, going to try, Because that’s a big struggle for me and I’m going to pick up that Jesus and Miss Kayla love and accept me Now. For me that’s a big deal because I want everybody to be happy and I feel love and appreciated when I mean, that’s just how I’m wired and it’s brokenness and that’s something I’ve been reading about lately. So I’m gonna try and leave that behind, that Brian is still okay and that it’s enough that Jesus and you love me. So that’s me. That’s my first you.

0:15:14 – Kayla
Kind of along the same thought process. What is going on? You just picked up a Godzilla and sat it down in front of you.

0:15:23 – Brian
I just don’t worry about him, Keep going. Things are gonna leave things are gonna leave. Godzilla is apparently not one of them. I’ve been watching a lot of movies. I just wanted to.

0:15:34 – Kayla
Okay, can you pay attention?

0:15:38 – Brian
What do you think? The answer to that question is no. Okay, then why are we asking?

0:15:44 – Kayla
I am going to put down other people’s expectations and their disappointment, and what I mean by that is you and I are both wired that we want everyone around us, everyone to be happy, to be comfortable. We wanna make sure that nobody is disappointed in us or disappointed in something that they expected of us. But I’m going to pick up just doing my best to love others well, practicing healthy boundaries and living into what God has called me to do, and if any of that is a disappointment to someone, then I’m gonna have to let them sit with that.

0:16:32 – Brian
And this is.

0:16:33 – Kayla
And that’s gonna be hard. Well, I just didn’t always go share this much.

0:16:36 – Brian
I mean, I’m kind of Well I didn’t know Godzilla was joining our podcast.

0:16:39 – Kayla
He is always in here, but here we are.

0:16:41 – Brian
Okay, I wanted to take a picture to promote the podcast.

0:16:44 – Kayla
Onto your next one. Well, I’m not sure how he fits, but anyway Onto your next one.

0:16:51 – Brian
All the hate for Godzilla, I’m gonna put down managing and leading toward a bank balance instead of chasing a dream, and that’s something that’s been really impressed upon.

0:17:03 – Kayla
For our organization, for the organization For the organization. Because I’m continuing to pursue our bank balance at home. Yes, I understand. Okay, very good.

0:17:12 – Brian
Okay, because you need a dream to chase.

0:17:15 – Kayla
Yes.

0:17:16 – Brian
You need a.

0:17:17 – Kayla
And some wise advisors nudged you on this, so I’m glad to see it.

0:17:22 – Brian
I love them.

0:17:23 – Kayla
So this one scares me. But, I’m going, I’m done with him, okay.

0:17:30 – Brian
You should see the look I’m getting.

0:17:33 – Kayla
I am setting down, playing it safe, and I am picking up doing a lot of things this year that scare me, but I will show up and this is in my work and personal life. Let us pray.

0:17:48 – Brian
You’re saying you’re gonna get a little bit more spots.

0:17:52 – Kayla
Not even promised that. There’s no spontaneity in that. That word wasn’t in there. Don’t be.

0:17:58 – Brian
don’t be reading, All right, I apologize, I did not see that word there. Okay, I’m going to put down that food. Feels a hole in my heart. I’m picking up what Jesus says about me and what Jesus is that. He’s enough. He’s good. The only thing with all my food, with my full allergies, with my wish I had full allergies, but with my food allergies, the only thing I can really sneak off and get now would be like tacos and but you don’t do that.

You really don’t. Not much. Since I got food allergies, I risked chicken. You have a good potato chip. I do, and I love chicken tendies, but they came back to bite me one day. Chicken tendies, that’s what the kids call them. What, okay, you don’t think that’s what kids call them.

0:18:46 – Kayla
Tenders, but okay.

0:18:48 – Brian
They are called chicken tendies. Okay, really, that’s what the kids Okay, kids call them chicken tendies okay.

0:18:56 – Kayla
Okay, if you say so.

0:18:59 – Brian
You call them Chicken tenders. Well, if you go on the Instagram, Okay.

0:19:05 – Kayla
I’ll take your word for it.

0:19:07 – Brian
They’re called chicken tendies.

0:19:08 – Kayla
I’m old now to touch and I’m good with that, so I Am going to come back to my last one and skip down, so Kind of in agreement with you, and again we did not come here.

0:19:20 – Brian
Here’s a moment say that again.

0:19:22 – Kayla
Kind of in agreement with you. We agree about a lot, just not Godzilla. I’m going to set down my love of junk food and if you’ve listened to any of our episodes where I’ve confessed I have a very strong Like of sugar and all things that are sweet chicken tendies. Well, I do like chicken tenders, but yes, but this year I am adding nutrition to my health journey and our trainer is actually going to be advising us on ways to make wise food choices so not only are we doing the yeah like the workout with our trainer this year but,

0:20:02 – Brian
we’re also picking up nutrition, oh he should pay me for eating this stuff he’s putting in front of us. No, not really yes, but he’s just giving you advice.

0:20:14 – Kayla
So there’s that he’s not forcing food on you. I think he is.

0:20:19 – Brian
I’m going to put down the fear of people being unhappy when I make certain decisions and I’m picking up, I’m picking back up that I am to lead the last three years or so have been really hard to lead through COVID.

0:20:33 – Kayla
Coming out of COVID. Yes kind of survival mode. Yes and Dancing delicately around and you’re coming out of it.

0:20:44 – Brian
I’m coming out of it, okay, so.

0:20:46 – Kayla
My final one is I am setting down my mindless television watching and doom scrolling on my phone. I Want to read at least one book a week.

0:20:57 – Brian
Wow.

0:20:59 – Kayla
For me I’ve set limits for myself with social media. I actually have set the app to where it tells me you’ve hit your daily limit and I have. I started this back in December that Instagram to tell you yes back at the first of December, I learned from someone that you can actually set your Instagram to tell you that it’s time to log off.

0:21:23 – Brian
I’m not ready to take that plunge.

0:21:24 – Kayla
I didn’t think I was and, but I did it and it’s probably one of the best things I’ve ever done, really.

0:21:30 – Brian
So I’m only average. Respond to certain reels I share with you.

0:21:34 – Kayla
It’s why I don’t respond to a lot, and it’s not because I don’t love people, oh, it’s just that that’s not a priority of mine.

0:21:42 – Brian
Text me, I’ll text you back, but Instagram is so if I text you a real, will you see it that way?

0:21:48 – Kayla
No, you need to stop. I will continue to enjoy social media, but just in smaller doses. I will enjoy shows and movies with you.

0:21:59 – Brian
We just started watching.

0:22:00 – Kayla
But I want them to add value, not just fill time. I’d rather fill it with books.

0:22:06 – Brian
We just started rewatching.

0:22:07 – Kayla
No down to Nami.

0:22:08 – Brian
That’s trying to say it right. I want to say downtown, but it’s down to nothing. So all right, so there you go.

0:22:15 – Kayla
So there you are.

0:22:16 – Brian
There’s season three, episode one in the can, as the professionals say, hey, we want to continue to send you.

0:22:31 – Kayla
We would love to gift somebody a coffee mug and some stickers. So for the first two people, I mean, we’ve done more than two at one time. If you go to our website, look for the trivia button. If you click that, what is our website be?

0:22:48 – Brian
peas and carrots podcast.

0:22:50 – Kayla
So, if you’ll go there, click the trivia button. Answer the question.

0:22:53 – Brian
This week’s question is oh, what is one thing you’re carrying into 2024? What’s one thing you’re going to do in 2024?

0:23:02 – Kayla
So share that with us. Be brave, tell us what you’re doing and we may check in on you later in the year.

0:23:08 – Brian
Just see how probably not, she probably will I probably won’t. I will check. She’s the nicer one of the two.

0:23:15 – Kayla
But go to our website answer the question. We have adorable stickers. I think they’re adorable and we hear they are from various people use the word adorable. That’s okay, but you do like the mug, I do. It’s a nice mug, so again our way.

0:23:29 – Brian
Our website is peas and carrots podcast calm. You look for the trivia button. Click that and answer this question.

0:23:35 – Kayla
What is one thing you are carrying into 2024?

0:23:39 – Brian
Hey, thanks for listening this week. You can search the peas and carrots podcast wherever you get your podcast, or visit our website at peas and carrots podcast common. When you do, don’t forget to subscribe to the podcast and when you go there to our website or find us on social media, drop a line about how appreciative you are that, like the Godzilla made an appearance in this week’s episode. You Should see the look why are you.

0:24:08 – Kayla
You can follow us on Facebook and Instagram. No requirement to reference Godzilla, just search for them.

0:24:17 – Brian
He’s very in carrots.

0:24:19 – Kayla
He has no feelings.

0:24:20 – Brian
Do you know, if you watch the Godzilla movie backward? It’s about a benevolent it’s. It’s about this loving lizard who rebuilds a town.

0:24:27 – Kayla
I’m done.

0:24:28 – Announcer
For more about the Peas and Carrots Podcast and to reach out to Brian and Kayla, visit peas and carrots podcast. Calm, growing through the challenges we face and finding hope along the way. That’s the Jesus Fix It Podcast with Jess. Check out Jesus Fix It calm or search Jesus fix it wherever you listen to podcasts.

 

 

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