Season 3, Episode 18: Oh, Bless

Can We Talk?
Oh, Bless - Episode Description

Join us, Brian and Kayla, as we recount our latest adventures, starting with our commitment to a three-day gym routine and Kayla’s intense day of gardening that led to some minor injuries and spider bites. We share a delightful dinner experience with new friends at the River Company, which brought a nostalgic sense of pre-pandemic normalcy. Listen in as we discuss the trap of self-sufficiency and the importance of recognizing and accepting the blessings, goodness, and grace of God as a gift, not something that can be earned.

In this episode, we also explore the everyday challenges of middle age, including sleep patterns, managing heat waves, and frequent bathroom breaks. We touch on the humorous aspects of forgetfulness and the diminishing effectiveness of multitasking, along with our differing tolerances for air conditioning and the concept of a “napitizer.”

It's A Trap - Transcript

0:00:00 – Announcer

We go together like Peas and Carrots. The Peas and Carrots Podcast, sharing life from our piece of the vegetable patch, Brian and Kayla Sanders. 

 

0:00:11 – Brian

Welcome to the Peas and Carrots Podcast. Hi, I’m Kayla and I’m Brian. 

 

0:00:16 – Kayla

How are we? 

 

0:00:17 – Brian

We’re good, we are good, we are good. We went to the gym every day this week. We did. Well hang on. 

 

0:00:27 – Kayla

We went to the gym for the three days we’re supposed to go? 

 

0:00:29 – Brian

yes, we did so, and it didn’t kill us it didn’t. 

 

0:00:32 – Kayla

I’m feeling it, but we’re here, yeah y’all. 

 

0:00:37 – Brian

We’ll be sitting downstairs about 8 30 at night. She’ll get up and she’ll walk like very gingerly. Y’all remember Tim Conway? I used to play that old man on the Carol Burnett show. She looks like she’s walking by sometimes. So, what’s up in our world besides that? 

 

0:00:55 – Kayla

Well, speaking of walking like that, Saturday I got this wild hair that I wanted to trim some of our shrubs. Seven hours later, mission accomplished. I was very sore for a couple of days Y’all she cut rose, bushes, shrubs, flowers. Planted some flowers. It was time, it’s spring. 

 

0:01:18 – Brian

And during the process she cut herself on all this stuff. How many nicks and cuts and bump bites oh, that’s not important. 

 

0:01:24 – Kayla

Actually, I really only ended up with two scratches, which is miraculous for me, but I think I got into a nest of spiders and I had about eight bites on me, so yeah, why are you telling me this publicly on this podcast? 

 

0:01:41 – Brian

and you’ve been sleeping next to me for a week since the biters. 

 

0:01:46 – Kayla

I think that’s what it was. I looked up the bites, kind of yeah, so I’m good, I’m still here I’m not really worried about you, I’m worried about them. 

 

0:01:54 – Brian

Things crawling off of you, onto me. 

 

0:01:55 – Kayla

They’re not on me, they were in the leaves and yeah, so calm down I’m a little whatever, we had an amazing dinner with some new friends. We did we did, it was yeah. 

 

0:02:13 – Brian

We went to one of our favorite places called the River Company. 

 

0:02:16 – Kayla

Some of you will understand this. It was reminiscent of pre-pandemic life and it felt like we finally got back to that. 

 

0:02:25 – Brian

Laughter stories. It was a grand time. Yeah, it was wonderful, it was. 

 

0:02:32 – Kayla

Yeah. 

 

0:02:33 – Brian

And we’ve committed to make it a monthly gig. We have so yeah that’s going to be fun. It was great. 

 

0:02:39 – Kayla

Speaking of restaurants, though, we talked about this, I think, maybe on our last, last podcast. But, B, how many times have we now been to Cabo after today? Because you have declared we’re going there for lunch today? Four, uh-huh. 

 

0:02:54 – Brian

In the span of two or three weeks. 

 

0:02:59 – Kayla

You now have a new favorite restaurant. I do, oh, I’ve got big news. Okay. 

 

0:03:05 – Brian

I just learned it this morning oh big news. Okay, the new Godzilla movie to be the minus one. Is that your way of saying you will not be watching this movie? 

 

0:03:33 – Kayla

with me. 

 

0:03:33 – Brian

I have some flowers that need tending, so and it is in Japanese, so you have to use subtitles, but it’s incredible. 

 

0:03:42 – Kayla

Oh, I’m outside. You enjoy that is, it’s Zilla. Uh-huh, carry on, you’re going to be the minus one. I’m the minus one. 

 

0:03:52 – Brian

That’s great. 

 

0:03:56 – Kayla

You and I were talking the other day about this trend towards people seeing themselves as very self-sufficient, and it led to several conversations. But another thing that I shared with you it was one of those evenings where we were just kind of bouncing around from topic to topic and I shared with you that I see how God has us in a season of plenty, and let me unpack that just a little bit. We are both seeing all the ways that God is blessing us in our lives and I admitted that in these seasons I wait for the other shoe to drop. It’s like I’m constantly watching for something bad to happen and that’s just my I think it’s my self-protection of let me not get comfortable here. But it led us to start talking about what it looks like when God is blessing all of us, and it was a great conversation that kind of had many aspects to it. 

 

So we’re just going to share some of that here, some of the things that you and I were discussing. 

 

0:05:06 – Brian

So I want to start here. Why do you think that in this season of plenty in other words, we have friends, we’ve been going out, the organization’s thriving, we’re going to the gym all these different things happening? Why do you dread yeah? 

 

0:05:24 – Kayla

So we’re in a season where all those things, life has been very peaceful. It’s been very calm for the most part. Don’t get me wrong. We’ve had some hard things. We even referenced that recently on a podcast. But for us personally, things have been very even keeled, as far as there’s not been a lot of drama and there has been, unless I’ve created it. 

 

0:05:47 – Brian

Let’s just be honest, okay. 

 

0:05:50 – Kayla

We’re in a state of contentment, would it be fair to say, with everything. I think for me it’s just when I was younger, a lot of times in my life when things felt good, something bad would happen, I would get bad news or there would be a bad situation, and so, yes, it’s probably not to use this term like it’s probably a trauma response that I can’t allow myself to really enjoy the good thing. 

 

0:06:18 – Brian

But, you’re scared Because. 

 

0:06:19 – Kayla

I’m scared of you know what’s coming next. What’s going to happen that’s going to take all of this away or make it not as pleasant as it has been. 

 

0:06:28 – Brian

There is a truth there, and I hate to share this truth, but life does come with pain. In other words, it rains oh I know that well. 

 

0:06:35 – Kayla

There’s a verse in Matthew the rain falls on the righteous and the unrighteous and either yeah you can view rain as a flood, or is it helping crops? 

 

0:06:44 – Brian

so you know, it’s the bad and the good happen to both the righteous and the unrighteous. 

 

0:06:49 – Kayla

Sure, I get that what you and I started talking about. So this is where we’re kind of dip our toe in here. We started talking about people who tend to believe that their blessings are something they did, or perhaps they have sown a seed and so therefore they are I’ve? 

 

earned this, I’m worthy of this, which led to this truth being good people does not merit us reward, it tells us in Romans 3, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, we did nothing to save ourselves. But there is this movement that I can name it, claim it, I can sow a seed and then God will do this good thing, or I am worthy of that. I’m a good person. I’ve given to charity, I’ve done this, I’ve done that. 

 

0:07:45 – Brian

Scripture actually says that the entire world, that the universe, groans under the curse. So everything here, because of what Adam, and Eve, eve did, we’ve all been placed under this curse and everything groans yeah there’s this brokenness to it. So here’s what I want to say the only thing that isn’t under the curse would be god himself. Yeah, okay, so everything else would be under this curse, here on earth and in the universe. So here’s the thing. If that’s the case, we can’t earn anything. 

 

0:08:22 – Kayla

No, it’s all a gift from him. Yes, yeah. 

 

0:08:26 – Brian

I’ve been telling you the last few weeks who deserves a life like this. 

 

0:08:31 – Kayla

Yeah, we’ve just been both sitting with that feeling like who are we to have so much of God’s goodness? And again, this is not a well look at us and it’s certainly not a life is just all rainbows and roses. There have been. We even shared that recently on a podcast. There have been a lot of difficult things for our PAR team that we have felt they are our family and we have walked through a lot of that with them. What we are referring to here is this mindset that we deserve the credit and we don’t I mean I’m going to go there. We don’t I mean I’m going to go there. Prosperity gospel tells us that we can improve our lives through devotion and a positive confession towards God. God doesn’t work that way. 

 

0:09:26 – Brian

He is not a genie’s lamp. No, you can’t go over and rub it and speak it and proclaim it. No, scripture says that he’s declared the end from the beginning. Yeah, so we can’t change that. For that I want to be cautious here, but I also want to speak some truth. There’s a great effort along this exact same topic, this exact same thing we’re talking about, yeah, to where everyone is saying you’re worthy. Yeah, or you deserve it or I’m worthy. 

 

0:10:00 – Kayla

You’re not, or God wants this for you. Or God, you’re worthy yeah or you deserve it, or I’m worthy, you’re not, or god wants this for you or god? 

 

0:10:03 – Brian

you’re not. How do we know the mind of god? Well, there’s that, but that’s a very good point, because we seem to shout a lot wherever god whispers. But I want to say this we’re not worthy of the goodness, the kindness, the blessings and the grace. You see, the song Amazing Grace. The reason why he wrote it is because grace is amazing, because we don’t deserve it. Yeah, and the moment we start saying we’re worthy or we deserve it, grace is no longer amazing, grace is then. 

 

0:10:32 – Kayla

And we minimize what he’s done. Yes, and that is not. That’s not the gospel. 

 

0:10:38 – Brian

And it’s amazing grace, it’s not earned grace. 

 

0:10:41 – Kayla

Yeah. 

 

0:10:42 – Brian

Who wants to sing earned grace. How sweet the sound. Who can earn it? Yeah? 

 

0:10:48 – Kayla

There’s another truth the goodness that God shows us should drive us to our knees in gratitude. It should should drive us to our knees in gratitude. It should not thanking us for ourselves, not thanking us for all the things we did or all the praise that we deserve, but it’s all about him. 

 

0:11:09 – Brian

I agree 100% with what you just said. My fault is I fall into a trap of thinking that if I keep doing X, y, z, oh, we all do that. If I keep reading, if I keep praying, if I keep going to church, if I keep, if I work harder, if I yeah. And that, if I don’t say as many curse words, you know that this blessing will continue to flow. 

 

0:11:34 – Kayla

Yeah. 

 

0:11:34 – Brian

That’s not how he works. No, it’s according to his will, whatever he wants to do and on his time frame. 

 

0:11:41 – Kayla

Yeah, may I admit that I’m one of these who has said well, they are such good people, I can’t believe that they’re going through this, or they would be such good parents, or they deserve so much better in life. We don’t get to decide that God’s the one that is sovereign over all, and no matter how good we think we are, no matter how worthy we think we should be, he is the one that holds all things. 

 

0:12:12 – Brian

You’re going to upset a few people because you started preaching, I’m just saying. But I’m going to say amen, preach louder. I am 100%. All in Well, miss Kayla, yeah, I’m 56. We won’t reveal your age, okay. 

 

0:12:31 – Kayla

I mean I’ve made it this far. I’ll be 52 in October. 

 

0:12:39 – Brian

You remember, at one time you lost track of a birthday I. 

 

0:12:41 – Kayla

You thought you were a year younger. I was 32 and I thought I was turning 31 and y’all, I had an absolute meltdown. You looked at me and would you like to share what you said. I don’t remember. Well, babe, it was a great year. I was here for it. 

 

0:12:56 – Brian

You actually sat down and cried, I bawled, I’m like I lost the whole year. 

 

0:13:08 – Kayla

You didn’t lose it. 

 

0:13:11 – Brian

It was right there. Here’s my thing you handle the finances in our house. 

 

0:13:16 – Kayla

You’re welcome. Middle age, it hits a little different. It does, doesn’t it? So I now have to take my glasses off to read labels. Or I’ve learned a trick, y’all If you’ll take your iPhone and take a picture of the label, you can then zoom in on it, you can blow it up so you can see what’s on the label. But I cannot read labels anymore. You walked into the kitchen the other day and I had my glasses in one hand and I was reading a label with the other here we are. 

 

0:13:46 – Brian

Sometimes, when you take something out of the fridge and you want to see the expiration date, does anybody have to go turn on an extra light? 

 

0:13:52 – Kayla

oh yes, I have to go stand by the window. 

 

0:13:55 – Brian

I just I turn on the. This is where we are I turn on? Flashlight on my phone and I highlight the date. So gone are the days of sleeping through the night. 

 

0:14:09 – Kayla

Oh yes, mercy, I wake up, at least once if not twice. 

 

0:14:15 – Brian

For me. I sleep two, sleep two, three, four hours. Uh-huh, I’ll wake up, go do my business, come back to bed and I’ll lay there for an hour. 

 

0:14:27 – Kayla

Oh no, I don’t do that, thank goodness, unless there’s a lot going on or I know I have a big project coming up at work. I go right back to sleep, but yeah, I have to get up and yeah, I’ll lay there for work. I go right back to sleep, but yeah, I have to get up. 

 

0:14:38 – Brian

And yeah, I’ll lay there for an hour if I go back to sleep. I’ve talked to some buddies of mine. This is normal. 

 

0:14:44 – Kayla

Now, I do wake up some nights with a heat wave, but we’ll just leave it there. So y’all it’s the funniest thing. 

 

0:14:50 – Brian

Let me just paint a picture. We’ll be downstairs watching one of our shows and in one of our shows and she loves for the house to be cool and cold and she likes to be all bundled up under my blanket, under a blanket. All of a sudden there is no announcement all of a sudden that blanket will come tearing off of her and one leg will stick out and I will just say baby, it’s my cooling mechanism. 

 

Yeah, and I said, baby you, you say I got a little heat wave happening, yep, but those aren’t happening as much anymore, are they every now?

 

0:15:20 – Kayla

and then, thank God, no Change your diet, it works. Just saying 9 pm is the new midnight for us. 

 

0:15:29 – Brian

And usually 8.15 to 8.45, is usually a napitizer. 

 

0:15:34 – Kayla

A napitizer? What in the world? You know we fall asleep. 

 

0:15:43 – Brian

Oh, we have done that lately. 

 

0:15:43 – Kayla

Yeah well, I’m usually taking a bath, but so you’re taking a napitizer while I’m taking a bath, did we not? We both fell asleep the other night yeah, and so we fall asleep. 

 

0:15:52 – Brian

Yeah, for about 30 minutes downstairs. We’ll wake up and you’ll say b, let you ready to go to bed, let’s go to bed. That 30 minutes is an appetizer. Yeah, before you get to the main sleep. 

 

0:16:04 – Kayla

Yeah, what is something you found with bathrooms B? 

 

0:16:11 – Brian

can we clarify that question a little bit? 

 

0:16:14 – Kayla

I cannot walk past one without stopping it’s like something in your brain says I gotta go you also don’t know at my age when you’re gonna see another one. 

 

0:16:22 – Brian

Yeah, so I’m always true. 

 

0:16:25 – Kayla

I used to joke with people who stopped at every bathroom and now I’m like well, that just makes common sense, we should probably do that. So yeah, I mean, I don’t Anyone else struggle with the forgetfulness. It’s like you can’t remember things that were just so easy. Come back or recall, and now it’s like, hmm, if I have to stay very attentive in conversations. 

 

0:16:51 – Brian

I used to be able to do two or three things at once and I could retain everything. 

 

0:16:55 – Kayla

Well, I think you’d be surprised to find out that’s most of us, because multitasking is not as brilliant as everybody thought it would be. 

 

0:17:03 – Brian

But I have to really zero in, listen attentively in order to retain the information. But the forgetfulness is a real thing. I’ll do a devotion in the morning at 5 am. By like 12 noon I have forgotten exactly. I don’t even know what I read. I have no idea. So I started doing an evening one too, just so I can. 

 

0:17:26 – Kayla

My thing is names. I’ll be sitting there, I can see someone and I think I honestly cannot remember their name. You know what I’d love? 

 

0:17:35 – Brian

is to have a pair of glasses. I’d like to have my glasses where they are, but I wish that Apple would invent a thing where my glasses could connect to my phone. When you walk up to somebody you could like tap them twice and it gives you their name. It would do facial recognition on them and would give you their name. 

 

0:17:53 – Kayla

Wow. Well, there you go. 

 

0:17:55 – Brian

Wouldn’t that be nice? 

 

0:17:56 – Kayla

The next big invention. 

 

0:17:58 – Brian

Maybe I just, Maybe you came up with it. I’m sure somebody’s already invented this, but yeah, these are things we’re finding at middle age. I can’t tolerate air conditioning as much anymore. 

 

0:18:09 – Kayla

Oh, bring it on. 

 

0:18:10 – Brian

You’re all about it. 

 

0:18:11 – Kayla

I am. 

 

0:18:15 – Brian

We bring it on. You’re all about it, I am. We have completely reversed. I mean, I’m downstairs under two blankets. You’re over there, you know. I mean you’re over doing a little dance, so it’s a fun. I mean I’m enjoying this stage of life with you. Oh, absolutely. I don’t always enjoy how my body feels. 

 

0:18:31 – Kayla

Yeah, yeah, it’s an adjustment. I remember your dad said something one time. He said I never thought I would get old and by far we’re not there. But I mean, but we’re on the yellow brick road. 

 

0:18:46 – Brian

I mean we’re going to see the wizard. You know what I’m saying? 

 

0:18:50 – Kayla

But I feel like a lot of people can relate to some of this. So there we go. This is us. 

 

0:18:55 – Brian

This is us, so I’m here for it. Hey, thanks for listening to this week’s episode of the Peas and Carrots podcast, and we would like to send you. 

 

0:19:05 – Kayla

We’d love to send you a mug and some stickers the first two people to go to our website and thank you to all those who have shared with us.

 

0:19:13 – Brian

I want to do a special shout out to a friend of ours. Okay, her first name is Hope. 

 

0:19:18 – Kayla

Yes. 

 

0:19:18 – Brian

And she’s been emailing us every week. Hope we actually see those messages. Thank you for communicating. 

 

0:19:23 – Kayla

There is a package headed your way. Yes, and we have been praying for your recovery, so we hope you are doing well. We’re excited for all of your plans for the summer. We pray that God blesses you with healing so that you can enjoy those. But yes, if, like Hope, you would like to get a mug and some stickers, go to our website. Look for the trivia button. 

 

0:19:45 – Brian

Our website is peasandcarrotspodcast.com. 

 

0:19:49 – Kayla

Yes. 

 

0:19:49 – Brian

Peasandcarrotspodcast.com. When you get there, click on the trivia button. What is this week’s question? 

 

0:19:55 – Kayla

What movie, minus one, is Brian excited about? 

 

0:20:00 – Brian

Oh, it’s going to be. It comes out tomorrow. Yeah, I’m so excited. So go to peasandcarrotspodcast.com. 

 

0:20:08 – Kayla

Click that trivia button. 

 

0:20:09 – Brian

Answer that question level of enthusiasm is not impressive. Okay, and this is the question what movie am I excited about? 

 

0:20:16 – Kayla

Uh-huh, okay. You can search the Peas and Carrots Podcast wherever you get your podcasts, or visit our website peasandcarrotspodcast.com, and when you do, please don’t forget to subscribe to the podcast you can also follow us on Facebook and Instagram. 

 

0:20:30 – Brian

Just search for the Peas and Carrots Podcast. 

 

0:20:33 – Announcer

For more about the Peas and Carrots Podcast and to reach out to Brian and Kayla, visit peasandcarrotspodcast.com. Life’s not perfect. That’s why God gave us friends like Melody and Candi. Check out QuirksBumpsandBruises.com, or search Quirks, Bumps, and Bruises wherever you listen to podcasts.

 

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